Saturday, September 29, 2012

I feel just awful.

I had been doing so well. Jurnaling all of my food, water, anything that went into my mouth. And getting to the gym. My goodness. I was exercising! I kept my journal with me, and was faithful, for about three weeks.

I'm not sure what happened. One day, I left my journal at home. It was in the back of my mind, "make sure that you wright this down". But I didn't. The next day I thought that I would right everything down from the day before and this day as well. Yet again, I did not. "It's okay," I thought," I eat almost the same thing every day, I know that I'm not hurting myself by not writing it all down." Besides, I wasn't planning on doing that for the rest of my life.

I went out for sushi, and purposely did not look at my journal. The following day, I felt like it was time to go back and write everything, except that I couldn't remember everything. I hadn't realized how many days had passed.
During this time, I had also only gone to the gym once. Everything combined got me depressed.

As I am new to the area (Just moved 1400 miles) I don't really know anyone, so that makes it just that much harder. I ended up calling my aunt on the opposite coast. She suggested that we have a glass of wine together over the phone. Well, one glass turned into three (I don't usually drink) and I ended up a little drunk. Then I ATE all the foods that I shouldn't have (and I didn't even truly enjoy it that much). That was yesterday.

As I said, now I feel awful.

On the other hand, I see my mistakes, and know that I need to start over. I now know that I do need my journal (even if it is for life). It seems to me, that that is where I hold myself accountable for my actions.

Live and learn as the saying goes, today is a new day.

So the lesson's that I have learned this week?
1) That I must (for myself) wright everything down.
2) Don't drink when I get depressed, it leads to much worse feelings down the road.

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