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No winning

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Well i managed to gain 5 pounds over the weekend. So I am officially declaring pizza a bad food. I did track my pizza, had a total of 3 slices. I was only slightly over my calories for saturday with the pizza. I even worked out on sunday but still managed to go up from 215.5 to 220. I am honestly starting to think I need to see a doctor about my thyroid levels and maybe see if they can help me lose weight somehow.

In the interim, I am actually going to stop eating so much bread. I think that might be my main issues. I hadn't really eaten that much bread back at "home" in Nevada. I was often quite good with rice and such and my main bread was a pita every so often and the occasional sandwich. I think I have bread with every meal here. Sadly, I like bread. So this morning I didn't have my usual English Muffin and had eggs with spinach. emoticon I have one pita left, so I will enjoy that with dinner tonight with my Spark People Sloppy joes i made last night.

My husband really enjoys his bread as well. I don't think he will give up bread. He's lost about 13 pounds since my arrival. Not very fair, but I cook healthy meals and he eats less processed and prepared type meals.

My other confessed sin is Oreos. I have eaten more than I have tracked but I have at least tracked my oreo intake... I am going to go back to my refusal of having junk in the house. At least of my own volition. I know better than to have junky foods at the ready. I don't know why I have slipped. But even with the oreoes, I was still at 215.... I am not sure what happened this weekend that made me shoot up so much in 2 days. I was 219 this morning, but still! My frustration is building. I still do my work outs 4 times a week on the elliptical at least 30 minutes; I've been adding Pilates to strengthen my muscles in my back and bottom. My chiropractor has noticed my pelvis and spine are improving. I just wish the scale, clothes, and overall feeling inside was better...

I just wish I knew what really was wrong with me. If there is something psychological, what is it?? if it's physical, i need to get that under some control. I know my husband loves me and thinks i'm a sexy woman even at this weight. I just want to do it for me so I can maintain a better image of myself, keep my health in check and not have to stare at my double chin. :( (I swear it's getting bigger!)

On another note: I have found a lovely trail to hike down near the town I live. I am still attempting to make my way the whole loop, as it's about 7.6Km, and some of the trail is not well marked. So i'm trying to explore a little further each time. So far I have only gone down the trail twice, but i have learned I went the wrong way the second time! So I have an idea of where i need to be next trip! Plus, I got some great pictures of the Ruins of the palace there.

Sorry for the whine. I just thought getting it down on some form of physical diary type thing might help my though processes. Maybe this is why blogs were really invented! A way to just keep track of one's thoughts. Today will be eating better, no bread except for a pita bread, and a nice walk in town (plus elliptical later before dinner). Thanks
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  • JOYCE12356
    I can feel and completely relate to your frustration. I sometimes wonder the same things...what am I doing wrong, what's wrong with me, etc, etc. These are normal feelings and part of what makes this journey hard. For me, it's usually my head that gets in the way of making progress. I don't know you well or know your whole story, but just from this blog...take a look at one thing - you said you were only over your calorie range a little from the pizza and you worked out on Sunday. So, the 5 lb gain - do you really think it can be actual "weight" gain? (5 lbs is like an extra 17,500 calories). So, it's most likely water gain. I know that even when I work out on the weekends, overall I'm usually not as active as during the week. This usually ends up equating to retaining water (usually most noticeable in my ankles), plus some abdominal upset (bloating, etc ...I'll spare you the ugly details!).

    How wonderful that your chiropractor has noticed improvement! I know it's not the changes that you want to see, but please remember...this is a process. It's usually a longer and slower process than we want it to be. Keep up the great work and you'll start to see some of those changes.

    We are always our own worst critics. If you haven't done so yet, taking pictures of yourself or doing measurements monthly might help to show you changes that you don't otherwise see.
    emoticon emoticon
    2113 days ago

    Comment edited on: 9/11/2012 8:33:04 AM
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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