When I first started working out with the Chalene Johnson DVD's, if I watched myself in the mirror, I felt upset. I'd look at the women in the workout videos, and wish I could be more like them, and less like me. I kept telling myself that the only way to do that was to KEEP working out, even though it made me sad to see how far I had to go.
There was one woman in particular, whose body looked like something I might possibly attain one day (you know, she had boobs and curves, but was really fit). She is Chalene's sister, and I love the way she moves, and how fit she looks. She was my goal body.
Well, this week, I was working out, and I looked in the mirror and thought, "you know? I'm pretty dang close to the girl in the workout video!" I'm not perfect, not by a long shot, but I really think I like my body at least as much as hers. Maybe even more, because I had to work for this one, and I get to feel how good it feels. Even more important than looking closer to my role model? ENJOYING my workout the way she does. I smile the whole time now. I do extra workouts, and I KNOW I FEEL as good doing it as she does!
I had such a great workout, that I made my smallish daughter take a couple of pictures of me, right there, all sweaty after kicking it for 45 minutes. Here I am... 20 pounds down from where I started, and 2 pounds under my initial goal for SP.
The girl in my closet? Well, she feels a little weird. Some of my old favorites, you know, the ones I used to love because they made me feel slender even when I really felt puffy? They don't look good on me anymore. I actually gave away two of my old favorite shirts, because I couldn't make them look right on me. It was so much harder to do than I expected. I had planned on keeping all my favorites, but looking better in them. It doesn't seem to be working out that way, which should make me happy-ish, but it leaves me feeling a bit strange. The girl in my closet can't wear her most favorite outfits anymore.
It is full of constant changes, this journey. Some that really make me smile, and some that make me feel wistful. I'm glad I have sparkfriends to bounce it all off of. You guys are the good stuff!