And I want a moment to be real,
Wanna touch things I don't feel,
Wanna hold on and feel I belong.
And how can the world want me to change,
They’re the ones that stay the same.
They can’t see me,
But I’m still here.
***I love this song, I'm Still Here, by Johnny Rzeznik*** It moves me... speaks to me, speaks for me in some ways***
Sometimes I feel so sorry for myself... I'm so fat, I can't control my eating, I hate to exercise, I need more money, my house is a mess, and real friendships are non-existent... and then I learn about someone who helps me put things into proper perspective...
Have you met Shiloh Pepin? An amazing little girl wise beyond her years, with a zest for life and a self-confidence like no other. Happy, accepting of who she is... with no desire for anyone to change her... "It's the way I was made when I was born." She told Oprah. And she remained true to her beautiful and precious little self until the day she died.
So... with this new outlook.. no more pity party. If there is something I want to change, then change it. If there's something I need to fix, then fix it... but above all, love life, live life, full of spirit!
Today's blog was going to be just that... a pity party. Day 1 of yet again another diet that I'm half-heartedly committing to... whining about lack of time and money to get things done... and varius ways I aim to change. I posted that before... Not this time, not now.
Well... I'm still here, I am a child of God, I am healthy, I am loved, I am in control of my own life and my own choices.. there is no place for personal pity... What right do I have to think things are so bad with me/for me? I do not like who I have become lately... full of excuses, lacking control, not caring most of the time, really, often feeling down and depressed...
Well, I don't want to be that way any more. And I won't.
"...who you are inside is what makes you a star." ~Shiloh
"You'll never know if you never try." ~Shiloh
"I believe she's here to just pay testimony that the human spirit is incredible and you can achieve your dreams as long as you have the will and the drive and the spirit," Elmer Pepin said of his daughter. "And she definitely has that, no doubt about it."
Shiloh Jade Pepin 1999-2009