Since moving into my own place, I have been experiencing a feeling that I remember having when I was newly married and only 20 years old. It is the feeling of utter happiness with my living environment.
26 years later, the difference is that I have raised a successful, loving and happy son. I am single, financially independent, love my job and have loving relationships with my family and friends. I am becoming increasingly 'at ease' with myself and as such I am embracing who I am with a new confidence and a sense of enthusiasm and excitement.
This weekend, I am housebound and I have no obligations to anybody else - I am free to do whatever I want! So what am I choosing to do?
I'm having a SPARK Retreat!
I'm trying out new recipes - I just had the yummiest lunch (Wood Roasted Salmon and Creamy Herb Spaghetti) and it was only 414 calories! Creamy products have now been replaced with Low Fat Greek Yogurt :)
I'm inspired to re-pot my herbs and grow some different varieties as they are sooooo good for cooking. I'm going to get my balcony so lush with yummy herbs, I can't wait! Nothing beats the flavours of growing and preparing your own food with love.
I joined Spark Coach last night - it is so motivating having the daily 'programme' to check in with. Today I emailed Spark Coach about a strengths training query and I got a response within an hour! That is so helpful :)
I am so amazed at how relaxed I feel by just being true to me. I am a nerd. I love being a nerd, and I will never try to be anything else just so that 'I fit in'. All these years I have tried really hard to fit in with everyone I meet - its been exhausting!
I understand now that living a lie without even realising it lead me to self destructive behaviours such as overeating, smoking, binge drinking, not exercising regularly ... I was trying to numb my sadness. Buried in the depths of my beliefs was the lie that I'm not good enough.
When I was growing up, positive messages were rare. The accepted and expected attitude was to cut down tall poppies and keep people humble ... sadly that mentality still prevails today, but things are changing.
Now we have access to inspirational, motivational and affirming messages through websites like SP. Research has increased our understanding about healthy human development and taking a strengths approach to life leads to incredible outcomes in lots of different areas.
Having permission to walk this talk, and apply it to my own development has been the most liberating experience in my life. It is important now that I make the time to really reflect on how I live my life, I need to process the changes in order for them to be integrated into my belief system. And I need to learn new behaviours - these take time.
So this weekend, I'm dedicating my time to processing and learning how to take better care of me. There is nothing else I would rather be doing right now, and I am savouring every moment!
Keep smelling them roses :)