Saturday, August 11, 2012
After looking at my page, I realized that I have not blogged since January. Maybe that is one of the reasons this journey has been going nowhere at all. Since I have only managed to remain active on one of my teams (and that one was lucky to get about one post a week), I want to apologize to all my Spark Friends out there.
Let me fill everyone in though. If you have read some of the updates and such on my friend feed, you will know that my boyfriend and I have broken up and I moved back to Indiana. It was quite a shock for me and I was pretty much blindsided. This happened in April/May and I moved back to my home state at the end of May. To say my life has been turned upside down is an understatement. I have struggled since May with stomach issues, anxiety, stress, and my RA seems to want to try and flare during all of this. I am trying to make Indiana my home again, although it is difficult. I loved the Bay Area so much and was so very happy there.
On top of all this, my father went into the hospital in February and to make a long story short, ended up having surgery on his neck in March. He has regained the ability to walk and has some use of his hands (which is a huge improvement over what he went in with), enough to feed himself. He will be having another surgery in September, this time to correct the spinal stenosis in his lumbar region.
I won’t go into details, but living at home at the age of 35 with parents that constantly fight (dad is going back on anti depressants this week thank goodness), and forget that you are a grown adult is quite …. Stressful. I am grateful they are letting me stay here to get back on my feet. I am blessed to have found a job so quickly (within 2 weeks of being home). I am truly trying to count my blessings rather than feel sorry for myself and at times that is extremely difficult. I am currently living in my mother’s sewing room, with a twin size mattress and box springs on the floor, with a small table as my living space. My clothes are in a suitcase and duffel bag. I am hoping to pick up a second job here soon to help me get my bills in order and paid off and/or down in a much shorter time frame.
I will try and keep posting and keep everyone updated. This was an extremely short version of everything that has happened in my life the past few months. The good news? I have been bouncing around with the same 4-5 pounds the entire time. Which means I have not gained and have not let myself emotional eat too much! This is a huge milestone for me and I am forever grateful for Spark for helping me. I know I have not lost, but maintaining my weight within a few pounds after everything I have been through is a huge victory in my book!
So I apologize to everyone for not being around as much and I am hoping to change that. For my Twilight Challenge Team members who read this, I am ready for the BD2 Challenge we are preparing for and I am going to try my hardest to get down a couple sizes by November!!