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Plumbing and bladder problems at the hospital. One in the same?

Sunday, July 15, 2012

The hospital I am currently a guest in is under construction. Yesterday the nurse came into my room and told us that we could not use the sinks, toilets or even drink the drinking water. They were not sure when the problem would be resolved and were not told what exactly happened.

A moment later another nurse brought in some blue bags with kitty litter-like crystals, and told me that I would need to 'go' in the bags which would be placed on commode chairs to avoid the toilet water. Hmm Ok fine. What could I do, freak out? I told my nurse that of course this meant that I instantly had to tinkle, but was not ready to deal with the bag thing just yet. 
The staff were busy trying to alert everyone and went off to the other rooms. I'm sure this was no fun for the them!

I swear I could literally hear my husband start to stress a second later. He stood up. He paced. He said he would need to leave the hospital soon since he might need to pee and didn't want to go in a blue bag over the toilet. "Take me with you!" I joked.

I reminded him nicely that his predicament was much easier for a man. And I was the one who currently could not walk unassisted + had an epidural in my back and an IV in an arm - so it might be a bit more humiliating for me. But it could be worse right? So then I started to think of HOW it could be worse as the 'potty train' of commode chairs were being pushed down the hospital hallways. 

What if all of the patients had just taken a laxative?
What if the hospital had a chili cook off?
Hee hee. 

Perhaps the fact that I had already been telling myself to pretend that I have been camping since last week to deal with my lack of real shower or clean hair helped.

I've gotten to know a few of the nurses a wee bit (ha ha 'wee'), and was joking about the hospital version of Soul Train we had going on in the hallways with the commodes. If the patients all hit their Call buttons then the hallway would light up like a disco! Woohoo its a Potty Train!
The nurse let out a loud guffaw and then told me that he was trying to get one of the nurses to wear a diaper under their uniform to add some humor to the situation. Ha! Sadly no one agreed to it. Boo : (

You know, it was barely more than an hour before we got the all clear to run the faucets and use the facilities, but you could literally hear the sighs of relief from the nursing staff, patients and their visitors throughout the facility. 

Well I guess I can find humor in the strangest of circumstances eh?

'Nuff said

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You are a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day. I'm pretty sure that if I was in the hospital and the water was turned off, I wouldn't be looking on the bright side. In my defense, I'd probably be the nurse having to clean up all of the bags of pee and poo, but still, you are able to see the humor and smile through just about anything and I admire that.
    2390 days ago
  • MOMKAT4310
    How funny / not funny. A hospital with unusable water. That is a little freaky. Hope you are doing better. It will be nice to be un-teathered.
    2396 days ago
    Wow! No working toilet in a home is one thing. Go to a neighbor I guess! But in a hospital! I can't imagine! Chris
    2397 days ago
    You are one in a million! emoticon
    2400 days ago
    Thanks for sharing, sending you lots of well wishes and hoping you can keep your sanity! It is such an awkward place to be. After my brain surgery, nurses had to help shower me, etc. I was happy I was medicated because I remember (kind of) feeling so embarrassed. My husband had to keep reminding me "they see it all the time".

    Funny to see you sparking while in a hospital bed, that must definitely improve the mood!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon

    ~ Laughter is the best medicine~
    2400 days ago
    hey, I didn't get a notice there was a blog here! I just went and checked and for some reason I got unsubscribed again. Sparkishly weird. So...I re-subscribed to your blogs so I don't miss any hilarious ones like this one. (prob wasn't so funny for you) But I have a funny to add - they sell those little blue bags in camping stores. They're called Travel John. And the crystals act like diaper crystals - the liquid (peepee) turns to gel. Yes. Sadly, I have experience with these little gems.
    2401 days ago
    You are such a nut! I'm sorry you are back in the hospital but I'm glad you didn't have to go in the kitty litter! Let me know how you are doing OK? Thinking of you with love!! Jan
    2407 days ago
    emoticon Thanks for sharing a laugh
    2409 days ago
    I love your sense of humor...(I always think of ways things could be worse as well) . The laxatives and the chili cookoff had me emoticon
    I know everyone was glad that the inconveince was for only a short time.

    Get well Soon!!!
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    2409 days ago
    Humor, my Spark Friend is where it is at! I love it! What were the odds of that happening?
    Glad you made it through....next time, remember your disco ball!!
    Happy Hugs!
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    2410 days ago
    There no other thing to say to this but, LOL!!!!!!!

    What funny thoughts a person can think of in strange situations.

    I thought of everyone in the ward doing the locomotion with the potties! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

    I bet there weren't any nurses making sure that everyone should drink their water. Perhaps they were hiding the water jugs on the trays?!

    Anyways, I'd better stop. There is no way I can list all of the things that come to mind..... emoticon
    2410 days ago
    emoticon for sharing a bit of a laugh with us! Although I am sure it wasn't funny for you at the time! It is great that you have a positive attitude in times of bad circumstances. Have a great day! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2410 days ago
    You have an amazing disposition. And the reference to a chili cook off made me laugh out loud emoticon
    2410 days ago
    emoticon You are so great. You always make me smile. :)
    2410 days ago
    Indeed, you can! And that's a gift! Humor can save us from really bad situations and not everyone is able to use their sense of humor when it's most needed. You should start lecturing on this one!
    I hope you're back home as soon as possible.
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    2411 days ago
    What a great attitude, I like your approach!! Get well soon!! :)
    2411 days ago
    Reading this made me smile. After all that you've been going through, you're finding ways to share your Spark and find the silly around you. That means you must be feeling a little bit better. Hopefully tomorrow IS the day you get to come home!
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    2411 days ago
    I'm proud of you for your humor. I would totally join you in the Potty Train if only I had the chance. When, on God's Green Earth, do you get out of there!?
    2411 days ago
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    You definitely need your own comedy show, Bren! Except you can't stand up...
    You could broadcast from your bed - the latest news and views from the potty train -
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    Thanks so much for thinking of me and sending relaxing music!
    2411 days ago
    Oh girlfriend, you crack me up every time! Glad didn't last long.
    Hugs ~ Melissa
    2411 days ago
  • CANNIE50
    Oh, sweetpea - as happy as you will be to go to your home, sweet, home - those nurses are really going to miss you. emoticon
    2411 days ago
    LOL I love your sense of humor. Finding funny in bad times = the right attitude!!
    2411 days ago
    I love your sense of humor Bren!! Stay strong and get home soon!! emoticon emoticon
    2411 days ago
    Bren, you are so funny!!!! Leave it to you to create fun in a crazy situation. You are so creative and you make nurses laugh! Hope you get home from that weird camping trip as soon as possible!
    2411 days ago
  • MILLIE5522
    I am laughing and crying with you! I would have been in a panic if I was told that I couldn't use the toilets.....put it down to my age :( And as for men, they will never really understand what an advantage they have! lol emoticon Love Sarah xxx
    2411 days ago
    what a great attitude you have about the situation! i'm sure that helps with the healing and getting better process. hope you're feeling well enough to be heading home soon!
    2411 days ago
  • LGAR519
    Sorry you had to go through that but glad you found some humor in the situation. Thank goodness I never had that happen when I was working!
    2411 days ago
    You made a great story from a horrible situation. I am quite sure the nurses around there are enjoying your company. Hope you get released soon. The camping part of it sounds like you are ready to be home. Take care and well wishes.
    2411 days ago
    Definitely, plan a break out......

    Use the potty chairs as decoys!

    2411 days ago
    How funny & horrible at the same time!!
    2411 days ago
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