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Sunday, June 17, 2012

For those of you know kind of know me at all, you probably know I've had a rough couple years. I got depressed end of 10/11 and got on meds that didn't agree with me, almost got fired (and I am an EXCELLENT employee and secretary!) and then while dealing with the depression and coming off the meds dealt with lower and then upper back pain. About 2 months ago now my sister was diagnosed with stage four breast cancer (although her doc said due to her health, age, where it's at, etc. he's considering it stage 2 (not in the charts but in his head) and gave her an 85% of living through it), then I got a lump during a mamm. Had to go back for another one and then an untrasound where they couldn't find it!! So then the Friday before I'm scheduled for a ACDF (neck surgery) they do a biopsy. So I go in to get my neck operated on Wednesday not even knowing if I have cancer. Well, I'm compltely out of it all day until about 10:30 that night which was weird I thought i'd have come out of it sooner but I vaguely remember the doctor telling my sister and one of my BFFS that the surgery went "surprisingly even better than expected". I called my doc the next day and the biopsy was just fatty tissue!!! (Only time in your life you'll be thrilled to have fatty tissue lol!) and when my DBinL was driving me home on Thursday evening (to his house) he told me about Char's doc "downgrading" her cancer (I didn't know until then, I still thought she had a 15% chance). So that's pretty much my BEST DAY EVER blog redone... but anyways through this whole thing I have been beyond depressed and anxious and overwhelmed and basically holding myself together with McDonald Chocolate Chip Cookies and Blizzards, right? I weighed in at the hospital at 283 I think it was. I was so unhappy. Well, I haven't been "dieting" until yesterday but I've been eating a LOT better since I got out of the hospital... and I just weighed myself... and I'm at 270.4!!!! The exact amount I was before this all happened :) I am SOOOOO happy and relieved. I can't even tell you how relieved I am. I was so disappointed in myself and almost seriously decided at one point to just give up but I didn't and here we are :)
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