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I am so mad at myself

Sunday, April 29, 2012

So I have been doing great excercising everyday and even adding doing eliptical and turbo jam everyday.. then friday came along and i got home later from work than normal and my hubby was suppose to be home but decided he would work longer so i was putting baby to bed and was planning on hitting the excercising machine and he calls and guilts me that why would i put the baby to bed when he didnt get to see her! So i let her stay awake and he took til 10 almost to get home. By then I was too tird to work out cause i was up since 430 am and had to get up again for work saturday! So i was mad at him for not allowing me to get in my workout and baby wasnt being cooperative for her to watch a movie while i workout either. So last night i got home from work and made dinner, ate and then he said he wasnt gonna give baby her bath. And my plan was he would bath baby for me while i workout. So since he wouldnt i gave her a bath and then was gonna workout figured he could play with her for 30 mins for me to go run.. but no he gult trip me saying i dont wanna spend time with her. Thats not a fair card i do just i am up at 430 every morning and waiting till putting her to bed is not realistic for me to workout because I am dead tired by that time. so i was gonna go for a walk but it was basically completely dark outside and baby just had bath so felt that would be appropriate. so at 9 i put baby down and he goes okay go excercise.. WTH.. I was already dead tired and he could see that.. so i didnt have the motivation to do it and instead hit the kitchen and ate a brownie :( I got more mad at myself and today still pissed I ate that damn brownie espiecially when i wasnt gonna work off any calories! and worst was i ate the thing and went straight to bed! So i thought id get up and workout this morning.. I have been trying this since i started my diet but have yet to make it successful. :( I feel like crap and feel like he is trying to mess up all my hard work. It not that i dont wanna spend time with my kid cuz i do just i know for me to workout I need to do it earlier and its so hard because he doesnt help with anything. I had ask him last night to start dinner before i got home and he refused... So I dunno what to do i am just at a loss? tonight I am gonna work my butt off hubby and daughter are going to disneyland with his family so they wont get home until late so I am gonna rush home eat some leftovers for dinner and work my butt off hopefully i can get myself to last longer on eliptical to burn more calories trying to make up for the lost two days.. any suggestions how to deal with the husband? I just dont understand why he wants to be supportive of me doing this
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    I'm sorry you're having to deal with all this! It sounds like your hubby need a kick in the behind! Sorry, but I don't think I'd be very happy with him either. I don't have a toddler so my suggestions might not be very helpful, but I'll tell you what I had to do.

    The first thing I did in my journey was explain to my husband that things were changing. Food, schedules, activities, everything! After that, there was a schedule of chores that were to be done by both of us. If he didn't want to do it that night, he had to do it the next day. Period. If he didn't eat what I ate, he had to cook his own stuff. No sweets were to be "left over" in the house. Thankfully he isn't a sweet eater so that wasn't a huge issue. He whines and complains but I remind him that by doing this he is supporting me and what I want to do. If he didn't support me, I wouldn't support him. No more laundry done, bills paid, house clean, etc. He stops whining and moves along every time! LOL.

    As for your issues with meals, perhaps you can look into freezing meals? I have been toying with the idea for a while and have been looking at recipes that would lend themselves to freezing like soups, stews, etc. I have one day a week I can devote to cooking. I want to cook four to five meals in a day and freeze enough for my family. That way if I don't feel like cooking, won't be available to cook or am running late I can just pull it out of the freezer and go. This, of course, would require more cooperation by your husband.

    If your husband isn't willing to cooperate I think you need to sit down and talk to him. Try to understand why he isn't willing to help. There are some men that feel "superior" or "in control" of their wife if the wife remains larger... I am not saying that is the case with your husband, but it does happen. Regardless of your decision on how to handle this situation you probably need to talk with him and find out why he isn't willing to help with the baby. Being a dad isn't about just the "play time" it's also about helping to raise a baby... feed her, clothe her, bathe her, etc. Hopefully he doesn't want to just be a play mate, but a father, too.

    Hang in there! It will work out. :) You CAN make it happen!!

    emoticon emoticon
    2240 days ago
  • RSTEINER1313
    dont beat ur self up over this.trust me. i keep saying the same thing and finally realized it wasnt worth beating myself up over. add a few mintures to work out the next few days to make up for that thats what i do
    2240 days ago
    I don't have any suggestions on how to deal with the hubby... I don't have one myself and that is one obstacle I don't have to deal with. Maybe a sit-down with him to talk out the issues?

    What I really want to say is don't beat yourself up for a couple of 'off' days. All you can do is learn something from them, let them go, and move on. I know it is hard to do this, but practice really helps! Sometimes life gets in the way... don't beat yourself up over life, just live it!
    2240 days ago
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