Day 5, 86 days to go, and loving it
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
I have realized so much about myself in the last few days. It's been so long since I've made any type of important decision for MYSELF. I have always put my family and pretty much everyone else's needs before mine. I'm not saying that's going to stop, it's just not my nature, I care about the people close to me so much, I hate to let them down. But all this time, I was letting myself down. I was not putting me into the picture at all, let alone first. How can someone who doesn't give two $**ts about herself possibly be the best she can be for anyone (let alone everyone) else? It wasn't working, and it won't work unless I make the decisions to try for myself. So realizing that I am just as important as the people I love, and that I, ME, should be included in that group of people I love.
I also realized that I'm a little bit greedy. I almost can't believe how this money is motivating me. It's like someone lit a $5000 fire under my butt. I'm almost a full week in, and the flames are only getting higher. The way I'm feeling is totally stoking those flames, too.
One other thing I've noticed is, slowly but surely, I'm gaining my confidence back. I got myself a ton of more colorful and sexy make-up. New, brighter colored clothes (I was getting sick of black anyway, lol). I want to take care of myself more all around. And it's getting noticed, which is also a big plus.
Until next time....