5 more days in the "Land of the Thin".

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

I am sounding like a broken record. I am so unhappy right now with myself. I am exercising a lot, but seem to be eating too much because I am not loosing weight. I just spent another 5 days is the world of the "Thin". My husband and his motorcycle friends went to Death Valley. I drove down in a car with the wife of one of his friends. That is a 10 hour drive down (split into two days) and a 10 hour drive home (split into two days) and one day there. During that 5 day time this woman had one breakfast of two poached eggs and a piece of dry toast the first morning on the road. No lunches or snacks at all and less than 1/2 half a small dinner each evening. I mean like she ordered a salad with no dressing and a bowl of soup and ate three bits. (By that time I was counting). Not enough to keep a bird alive. I had an upset stomach the whole time because all the meds I take require food in my stomach. I also had a head ache from being hungry. The men were on the motorcycles going out to breakfast, lunch and dinner and I was stuck with skinny woman eating nothing except the snacks I had in the car for my husband. So how good can Frito's be for breakfast? One day I tried to get her to go to Starbucks for coffee so I could get one of their chicken sandwiches to eat and that was a major issue. She kept saying that she knew that I needed to eat so much more than her and that she would be glad to stop and watch me eat, but that she had two cups of coffee for breakfast and that would hold her till dinner. Oh my gosh! Are you kidding me? Then she was trying to push her home made cookies and banana bread on me that of course, she wouldn't eat. I needed real food. Protein, salad and veggies. She is trim, needless to say, but not as thin as she should have been for how little she was eating. I couldn't figure it out. Was she sneaking food behind my back and WHY? We hiked over 10 miles the one day we were in Death Valley all day and I was carrying 25 pounds of camera equipment on my back. The day we left Death Valley we hiked out to the sand dunes about 1 1/2 walking in loose sand. Still with me carrying my 25 pound camera bag. Still she wasn't eating. I ended up feeling like a giant oaf begging for food. I enjoyed her company except for this food thing she was doing to me. I have never been around someone like that. I hope I at least got some good photos for all my trouble. I am in such a bad mood now I don't even want to look at my shots. I will wait a couple of days until I can calm down and like myself better. I can't remember having someone seem so nice and yet make me feel so bad about myself. She is skinny. I am heavy. She isn't eating and I need to eat. Very strange indeed. I know I am better than all that.

I know you all stand behind me and I feel your hugs.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL! I do think part of the food issue I have with my brother is that I have talked about it and now he brings it up. He has been really annoying lately. IF it is not about meat, it is about sodium. I was making him lunch with low soduim v-8 juice and omega 3 enriched spaghetti. He didnt come over right away so I put a tsp of olive oil in the spaghetti noodles so they woulnt stick. He said I ruined it because olive oil shouldnt be heated. THe pan was already off the burner! I am doing very well as far as healthy eating and going to the Y. Just give me a break!!! I cant even change the subject!! I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL!!! emoticon
    2248 days ago
    I love your idea of eating in front of her and making her crazy. Eating right in front of someone who is so out of touch with what it takes to be large and healthy might just be fun instead of excruciating. Good idea.

    I have many thin fit friends and they don't do this to me. I think it was some kind of self centered "I'll show you how to eat (not eat)" kind of thing.

    Thanks for understanding my frustration and letting me vent.
    2255 days ago
    I can't imagine living with that for 5 days. You sound like you are in really good shape if you can walk 10 miles carrying 25 pounds in loose sand. You know your body and what you need so in spite of people like her take care of yourself.
    I would be more worried about her. What and how she ate is not healthy. Maybe she is an out of control eater, just think, eating in front of her could have been driving her nuts (smile and take mischievous joy in that thought).
    Oh yeah, I would probably not pick her as my traveling buddy again or if I had to, I'd ignore her and do what I know I need to take care of me. You can do it!
    2255 days ago
    Thanks for understanding. I think she wanted to help me not eat. I don't know. It all seemed very weird to me. Oh well. It is over now and I have been eating right all day today and feel better already.
    2256 days ago
    That would be incredibly nerve-racking! I would worry more about her heath than someone who is overweight. It sounds like she has an eating disorder. That is certainly not a healthy way to live. Or do you think it's possible that she is one of those people who is embarrassed about eating or possibly "showing off?" I used to know a couple of women who behaved that way, and it was only if they were around people that they didn't know well or at a party. Either they worried the other people would judge them based on how much or what they ate, or they were "showing off" how little they needed to eat to impress their new friends. (Even though that's not at ALL how they ate when we were alone.) I never figured out which one it was.

    Don't be hard on yourself! I don't blame you for being grumpy when you've been starved half to death!
    2256 days ago
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