Just One More Self Talk

Friday, April 06, 2012

Here I am again. Sitting at 260 and wanting so very bad to drop below 250. Why is it such a struggle for me to get below that magic number? I yearn to see that scale read 249. And yet every time I get this close or even down to 253 I sabotage myself. It doesn't make any since to me. I really do want to make it and then set another goal. But it feels like almost panic. Does this happen to any of you?

I did it again last night. I stuffed my mouth with things I would not normally eat and come Monday I will be paying for it. That scale will start moaning before I even step on it. And then I will have to hang my head and face it, face my team mates on the Biggest Loser Challenge I am on, And I still have to deal with Easter.

Somehow I need to rethink my strategies and come up with a winning solution. I know I can do this, and after all, this is the third time I have got this close. Third time is a charm, RIGHT? RIGHT!!! So I am going to stop this negative thinking and get on with losing!! After all, I am the head and not the tail. And I deserve to be a healthy thriving body that can do anything that I want to do. Walk, Ride a bike, dance a jig, and most of all enjoy life once again. So here I am and 250 will soon be a thing of the past and I will be on to another goal ( 225, here I come!!!

I only have one option, JUST DO IT, I AM WORTH IT!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    oop, duplicate....
    2533 days ago

    Comment edited on: 4/10/2012 9:18:21 AM
    Gail and Jeannie and Jill - you are such GREAT spark friends, I wish I could magically give you the magic to leave un-health behind you. I started Sept 2011... floundered a little here and a little there, was no where near where I wanted to be after 4 months but as I have gotten rigid with my calories this last month (thanks to encouragement through tub lady and indygirl), I'm finding that my hunger is gone... I mean it is now 7 months, and I had no idea I would EVER struggle to get enough calories in -- and have to go for an 11pm snack to make 1000 calories. I will be praying for you.
    Nothing tastes as good as peace feels!! It is such a battle, such a journey, but YOU CAN DO IT! and IT'S WORTH IT! I still have a long ways to go, but I see a flickering light at the end of the tunnel now..... and I'm excited to get back into clothes that I left behind 10 years ago!
    2533 days ago
    Gail dear you are so right ...
    We do have to take responsibilities for our actions ..but, first we must find out why we feel this way and get over it ..
    It is a mind set .. I think we are fearful of what lies beyond .
    We fear we cannot maintain a loss so why bother ?.
    We also fear we may change, but most of all I think, we fear we may fail, and that is why we sabotage ourselves.
    We need to realise we are doing this for a very important reason that is not necessary cosmetic.
    It is for our health and well being .
    This is the most important part of getting rid of all that extra weight ..
    It is so that we can live a normal healthier live, and not need constant medical attention and aids and all the rest of what comes because we are to overweight .

    You can do this my friend ... look how far you have come ..
    Hugs Susie emoticon
    2535 days ago
    I think it is the fear of the unknown. We have to let go of the fear to make progress. emoticon

    Spark On! We Got This!
    2536 days ago
  • NORA-L
    You are worth it! I've been fighting the 560s for a year now. I understand your frustration. We can do this!
    2536 days ago
    I have my fingers crossed for you. I too want to see the underside of 250. I know I can do it, I just have to keep focused and on myself all the time. I read your comments and your blogs you are a strong woman…you can do this. Concentrate just a little harder. Maybe we can count down together!

    2536 days ago
    Keep pushing and don't give up...we've all been there (I am here right now. In fact, I haven't lost weight for 3 months...ugh! It's my own fault!) I am NOT going to quit, though. I will get this. I keep tracking and I have tried to start being more active...We shall see where that takes me!

    Best wishes for getting back to it!!
    2536 days ago
  • SPEEDY143
    I could have written this blog... same weight barrier too. It took me some time to figure out what the physiological issues were because I was still doing every thing I had been doing and making such progress!!! What happened??? Well I realized if I lost any more I would weigh less than 2 very, very, very dear family members and that made me feel bad. emoticon Haven't been able to shake that yet soooooooooo here I sit... not wanting to upset anyone (typical of me) I'm still such a work in progress even at 64 years old emoticon I also noticed that I'm attracting more attention from men when I'm out and that brings up a lot of issues from when I was younger. I should just take a self defense class emoticon and get on with losing more weight because I really do feel so much better and that's what its all about emoticon

    Stay strong Gail emoticon

    emoticon Linda
    2537 days ago
    Well, Gail, you said exactly what I've been thinking about ME! What on earth is the matter with me? Why am I doing these stupid things when I know exactly what will happen? I'm working on it and before everybody starts jumping up and down and says don't beat yourself up, I DO think we have to do some self-examination and think about why we do this? That doesn't mean we're beating ourselves up at all, but rather trying to sort if out. I got into a couple things this week that normally wouldn't be even a little interesting to me--some really awful oatmeal raisin cookies (I could understand a little better if they were good, but NOT in this case) and crackers and peanut butter. I don't even care for peanut butter that much. So, sweet Spark Sister, if you figure it out, let me know! I'm not sure it has anything much to do with a weight goal (I've been flirting with getting under 210 for several months) as it does making choices that I know lead to disaster, even if it is a temporary disaster. I have a few ideas for dealing with those times, but the critical thing is to put those ideas into action before I let the "hand to mouth" disease out of the box! Thank you for putting it into word!! Sending you hugs and love, and hopefully, lots of support for all of us!! Jeannie
    2537 days ago
    2537 days ago
  • JILL313
    Gail, You sound just like me as I also want to be below 250 for the first time in years. I've been "whisper" close but I always seem to slip up right before my weekly weigh in. Why is it every time I'm within read of that goal I start to be my frenemy and then I "beat myself" up and have to restart working toward that "magic" goal again. Like you, I know I will be healthier and enjoy Life more so what is wrong with me?? If you figure it out please share it with me.


    2537 days ago
  • OPTIMIST1948
    There was a terriffic article in the DailySpark about someone who focused on changing one little thing each week. It really resonated with me. I think it could be the kind of thing that helps you get past that phycological hurdle...after you are not loosing a ton of weight...just getting your 10 min of exercise in. Getting 5 servings of fruit or veg.. Trying meatless recipes. Whatever.

    Yes you can do it and you deserve it!
    2537 days ago
  • MISSG180
    I panicked like that when I got close to 200 the last time I lost weight. I ended up gaining it all back and then more. This time I'm going in determined to have the support of Spark People to help me through that. You can do this. You deserve it!
    2537 days ago
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