STACIA_ANGEL
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Out From Underneath A Shadow

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

What a beautiful day today turned out to be! We were only 3 degrees short of a record high. And tomorrow is supposed to be a record high. I love it! I'd swear I was meant to live someplace tropical rather than Wisconsin. The robins & red-winged blackbirds are back. The bald eagles & gulls have been going nuts on the river. And I wake up to the sound of birds again. Love love love! (Though I'll only love the birds for a couple weeks until I get tired of them waking me up.) Speaking of birds... I went birding with brother #3 & his girlfriend this weekend. We didn't see anything we were hoping to but I still enjoyed spending time with them. Then we got brother #2's stuff put in storage so that I don't have it all sitting in my house making me feel like someone had died. The house looks a lot less cluttered now!

Brother #1 took this week off for vacation so he came to visit me yesterday. He's hoping to visit again sometime this week. I think he might actually be visiting the PS3 so he can play GT5 but I don't mind. He & I don't have a whole lot in common so I just like see him enjoying his vacation.

My husband had the day today so I convinced him to go on a walk with me. So instead of doing my walking video I got to enjoy the sunshine. I even wore shorts because it was so warm! We ended up walking 2.8 miles. Probably more than I would have done with the video but less aerobic. We enjoyed the walk & it made for a great change of pace. And then I attempted to lift some weights too.

My weight has been staying about the same lately maybe one more pound less. But I took my measurements again & finally I have some change somewhere other than my arms! LOL I forgot to write them down though so I'm going to have to remeasure again soon & enter them into the tracker. But at least I know there is some progress even though the scale & my clothes are refusing to show it.

I got a letter from brother #2 in the mail today. It's the first time I've heard from him since "the incident". I have been waiting for this letter because I knew it would be coming eventually. I mean I knew we had to talk about stuff sometime. It was harder & easier than I expected. I thought that when I got the letter I'd immediately rip it open then read it & then have a break down & cry. Instead I set the letter on the table and walked away. I'd walk by it & see it but I just wasn't ready to read it yet. When I woke up today I didn't realize that today was the day I would have to start dealing with my brother. Finally my husband was getting ready for bed & I realized I wouldn't be able to sleep without reading it & if I read it after my husband went to bed I wouldn't have anyone to hug me afterward if I needed one. So I finally opened the letter & read it. I learned that some of the things I've thought I understood, I was wrong about & that made me happy. Other things actually made me angrier. But my brother apologized & I really needed that. I'm now ready to write back to him. I wasn't before because I was hurt & even though I had already forgiven him for hurting me I felt it was his place to make the first move repairing things. While I was dreading this letter in a way, it's now past & things are better than I expected, no crying or hug needed. I'm hoping this shadow I've been feeling lately will now be lightened.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • JOYFULJUDYLYNN
    Sounds like things are getting better. for ya. I'm glad. emoticon
    2428 days ago
  • CAKEMAKERMOM
    I'm glad you were able to get out and enjoy the weather with some of your family. Sounds like you had a lot of fun!

    I also hope that you're starting to get the understanding about your brother that you needed. It sounds like you will gain a different relationship with him, but still be able to have a relationship with him. I hope for a lack of drama with him.
    2431 days ago
  • VLKSHA
    So glad he made the first move, you did deserve it. Your a great sister to allow him to take away the shadow that wasn't yours! Loving the sunshine too! Wishing your family the best.
    2431 days ago
  • COCOA-JUMBO
    So good to hear you sounding so happy! I'm glad you can make peace with your brother. It will make your life so much better!

    Keep up the great work on exercising! It will begin to show!
    2433 days ago
  • CCASKEY37
    Don't you just love spring? I hear you about being tropical. I was crazy to ever return from Puerto Rico (if only weather were the only thing on which to base life's decisions).
    2434 days ago
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