Out From Underneath A Shadow
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
What a beautiful day today turned out to be! We were only 3 degrees short of a record high. And tomorrow is supposed to be a record high. I love it! I'd swear I was meant to live someplace tropical rather than Wisconsin. The robins & red-winged blackbirds are back. The bald eagles & gulls have been going nuts on the river. And I wake up to the sound of birds again. Love love love! (Though I'll only love the birds for a couple weeks until I get tired of them waking me up.) Speaking of birds... I went birding with brother #3 & his girlfriend this weekend. We didn't see anything we were hoping to but I still enjoyed spending time with them. Then we got brother #2's stuff put in storage so that I don't have it all sitting in my house making me feel like someone had died. The house looks a lot less cluttered now!
Brother #1 took this week off for vacation so he came to visit me yesterday. He's hoping to visit again sometime this week. I think he might actually be visiting the PS3 so he can play GT5 but I don't mind. He & I don't have a whole lot in common so I just like see him enjoying his vacation.
My husband had the day today so I convinced him to go on a walk with me. So instead of doing my walking video I got to enjoy the sunshine. I even wore shorts because it was so warm! We ended up walking 2.8 miles. Probably more than I would have done with the video but less aerobic. We enjoyed the walk & it made for a great change of pace. And then I attempted to lift some weights too.
My weight has been staying about the same lately maybe one more pound less. But I took my measurements again & finally I have some change somewhere other than my arms! LOL I forgot to write them down though so I'm going to have to remeasure again soon & enter them into the tracker. But at least I know there is some progress even though the scale & my clothes are refusing to show it.
I got a letter from brother #2 in the mail today. It's the first time I've heard from him since "the incident". I have been waiting for this letter because I knew it would be coming eventually. I mean I knew we had to talk about stuff sometime. It was harder & easier than I expected. I thought that when I got the letter I'd immediately rip it open then read it & then have a break down & cry. Instead I set the letter on the table and walked away. I'd walk by it & see it but I just wasn't ready to read it yet. When I woke up today I didn't realize that today was the day I would have to start dealing with my brother. Finally my husband was getting ready for bed & I realized I wouldn't be able to sleep without reading it & if I read it after my husband went to bed I wouldn't have anyone to hug me afterward if I needed one. So I finally opened the letter & read it. I learned that some of the things I've thought I understood, I was wrong about & that made me happy. Other things actually made me angrier. But my brother apologized & I really needed that. I'm now ready to write back to him. I wasn't before because I was hurt & even though I had already forgiven him for hurting me I felt it was his place to make the first move repairing things. While I was dreading this letter in a way, it's now past & things are better than I expected, no crying or hug needed. I'm hoping this shadow I've been feeling lately will now be lightened.