Tuesday, March 13, 2012
This weekend was a little unusual. We had out of town guests. I bought stuff I normally don't have around like lunch meat & cheese, cookies, made homemade chicken noodle soup, etc. So needless to say I didn't exactly track my food nor did I really watch or make conscious choices. Ugh. So I weighed in 3 pounds heavier on Monday morning. Sunday evening I had made the decision that I really really want to work on the extra junk around my middle. The only way to do that is up my exercise and focus on healthy eating. Monday was PERFECT! Egg whites & wheat toast for breakfast, yogurt & muesli for snack, turkey & swiss on a wheat wrap for lunch. I definitely ate more during the day than normal & had consumed almost 1000 calories before supper. So I made spinach ravioli and a serving fit perfect into my day along with a big scoop of California medley veggies. I even had a little wiggle room. So at 9 pm I decided to have a cup of Chai Tea. Again, this fit perfectly. No guilt. I sat down on the couch with my son & his bag of pretzels. Damn.
**I** made the conscious decision that I would savor the taste of just a few. That went out the window because they were so incredibly tasty! It was the Honey Mustard & Onion Pretzel Pieces. Yeah. Now, it's not like I ate the whole bag. I had maybe a cup total which I ate really slow & savored each piece AND I did my Zumba DVD that morning.... I'm just so disappointed in myself that I ate an additional 400+ calorie ( 20+ grams of fat ) AFTER I had reached the maximum on the nutrition tracker. I feel a little defeated because this is not "just one day" or "a random mishap". This is what I do a lot of days. I have trouble denying myself. I like what I like & I can't say no.
On a funny side note, when I wanted to quit smoking & couldn't, I prayed for God's intervention because I have no self-discipline. He provided. I no longer smoke. He accomplished this by making me allergic to cigarette smoke, perfume, chemicals and all sorts of other things that I can no longer enjoy. I don't DARE ask for God's help with my diet!!!! lol. I'd probably become allergic to food.
If you've read this far, thanks for reading. I just needed to vent. I need to find a strategy to stave off hunger after, oh say 7 pm. Or a way to distract myself from mindless eating when I'm feeling uneasy.
Eh, I still wanna focus on whittling my middle & staying within my limits today. Two steps forward & one step back is still progress.