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The Lost Weekend

Monday, March 12, 2012

It’s best if I don’t post the numbers for this weekend. They’re pathetic.
I would say I did nothing healthy whatsoever, but it would be a lie - I did one of Coach Nicole’s YouTube workouts on Saturday morning.
It was all downhill from there.
Actually, it started before that - it started when my parents decreed that the departure time from NJ would be 2pm on Friday.
There was just no way that was going to work.
We hit traffic pretty much the second we got onto Staten Island, and didn’t escape it until we were halfway across Long Island. 3 hours of bumper-to-bumper, and tempers fraying, and Dad’s driving getting progressively more terrifying. By the time we got to Plainview (where my mother grew up) with the intention of going to a diner they remembered from their youth, Dad was flying blind and irritated as hell because we were trying to tell him that there were cars braking in front of him and wouldn’t it be nifty if he stopped before we plowed into them, and that it would be inadvisable to use a hospital driveway as a place to turn around. Oh, and the diner? Yeah, that’s a Walgreens, now. It’s the 2nd time we’ve tried stopping at the same nonexistent diner, but the first time, the bagel place in the same shopping center was open. This time, since it’s a kosher place and it was almost dark on Friday night... yeah, not so much. FINALLY, we found a sports bar/restaurant that looked safe and extremely busy (which we took as a good sign), and pulled in there. Had a surprisingly decent dinner (kudos to The Main Event in Plainview, NY for having some seriously yummy veggie rice, a great family-friendly atmosphere, and being nice to some seriously grumpy people who were just passing through), then I took over driving. I was safer than Dad as far as being able to see and drive, but the difference is that he knew where he was going, and I was utterly clueless… not sure it was a great trade-off, but we managed. By the time we got to the hotel, we were all grumpy as heck, and I was calling for WINE, please, since everyone else got to have something to drink at dinner, but I was S.O.L. So Dad and I got back in the car, and headed to the nearby liquor store, which, conveniently, was walking distance from the local Stop & Shop. Our rooms were (thankfully) equipped with small fridges, so I bought some GF bagels, and a few other munchies (hummus, GF pretzels, a few other things). We had a quick chill-out get together in their room; I had a glass of wine, they had what they were drinking, we all had hummus and pita chips or pretzels and went to bed a whole lot more cheerful than we’d been upon arrival.
The next morning, the bar mitzvah was scheduled for 9:30am. I got up early, did day 1 of the Swimsuit Bootcamp workout, and hopped in the shower. We all got ready and headed to breakfast around 8 – 8:30. I had my Rice Chex w/ Craisins that I’d brought with me, some 2% milk (w/ Lactaid) and a small banana.
This was the last decent meal I’d get for hours and hours.
Off we went to the synagogue. We arrived slightly early, so we got to catch the tail end of the final rehearsal. Then we were there for the entire 2+ hour ceremony.
I tell a lie – I convinced my 6 year old niece that she’d really be happier in the restless kids’ room and escaped for about a half hour towards the end of the ceremony. It was more for my benefit than hers; I was close to having to physically restrain myself from digging my phone out of my purse to start playing Angry Birds, or something….
Afterwards, the rabbi invited us to go the (ice cold) reception room at the back for challah bread (which I couldn’t eat) and wine (which we decided to hold off on till later, when we could have the good stuff). So off we went to the reception restaurant. It was truly charming; low-ceilinged, old-school place. Fine by me, a little rough on the tall folks. ;-) When we arrived, the wait staff was circulating with appetizers: kielbasa on a stick, little dumplings, bruschetta, shrimp coated with barbeque sauce... it all looked delicious.
And it was all stuff I didn’t dare eat.
Instead, I got a glass of wine. And the bartender was GENEROUS; it was a massive glass of wine.
Fortunately, I drink slowly.
Unfortunately, I had no food in me at all, at this point. I did finally break down around this time and gobble down the Luna bar I had in my purse, but it didn’t really make a dent.
They come around to take dinner orders, and I ask for the salad, and (of the obligatory beef/fish/chicken options) if the herb-roasted chicken is gluten-free.
The look of terror on this waitress’s face would’ve been funny, if I hadn’t known it betokened badness for me.
“We’ll just grill it for you.”
...OK, that seems safe enough.
Well, that’s what they did. They grilled a piece of chicken. No herbs. No sauce. No seasonings whatsoever. Also, no flavor, and no moisture. It was tasteless, and incredibly dry. I managed about 4 bites before I gave up.
For what it’s worth, everyone else’s looked, and by all reports, WAS, pretty good. The filet mignon, in particular, looked delicious, though my father ordered his medium rare, and it was closer to mooing than medium. But other than that... it looked lovely.
Of course, all the desserts were cake-based.
By now, I’m on my second glass of wine, and I’m rapidly approaching utterly plastered status.
This was not my intention, but it sort of worked out that way.
Finally, we left, with my cousin (the father of the now-“adult” kid) inviting everyone back to the house. We went to the hotel first. The ‘rents went for a nap. I laid down for a bit, myself, though I didn’t sleep. I didn’t sleep much all weekend, actually; the hotel was full of busloads of college students, and they ran up and down the halls all night. Finally, I got up and ate one of my GF bagels. Feeling better, I went off in search of my brother, who’d made noises about wanting to head over to the house. We gathered the two elder of his children, and off to the after-party we went.
They ordered pizza, and dipped bits of pita in hummus.
Still starving.
I poured myself a SMALL glass of wine. That would’ve been fine, except then my cousin kept refilling it. So within an hour or two... blitzed again. *sigh*
When we left and headed back to the hotel, I stopped by to see how the parents were doing. They were wide awake, now, and asked what I wanted to do next. I said,
“Food. Please, please, pretty please… need food.”
So Dad and I headed off to find the closest Outback (which, as it turned out, was about 7 minutes away up the same highway the hotel was on... yippee!). Once there, I ordered a Sprite (thank you very much) and my much-beloved Chicken-on-the-barbie. And I finally, finally, for the first time since breakfast, was FULL. Ate the whole thing. All the green beans, too. And three shrimp.
Sunday was better; we headed out at about 10:30am, hit almost no traffic, Dad was a viable driver all the way into NJ (I took over at the 2nd rest area on the Turnpike, when he’d started drifting a little too close to the cars in the neighboring lanes)... all was well with the world. We went back to their house, unloaded all our crud, headed off to yet another restaurant where I had the chicken piccata (which was lovely) and garlic mashed potatoes (not so much), and then I headed home.
I had noble hopes of getting in a workout, making some jewelry, doing some cleaning… whatever.
What I actually accomplished was being a complete and total lump. My entire body hurt. I was completely exhausted. I stared blankly at my television while Netflix kindly played the remainder of Doctor Who season 6 for me. I ate hummus and Glutino crackers, and was incredibly happy to be home.

So! What have we learned from this lesson, kids?
I thought, since it was just a short trip, packing breakfast and some snack bars would be enough to get me through.
This was not the case.
I’m going to have to really work at bringing food with me that I’m going to be able to eat, or at making sure that wherever it is I’m going, there’s going to be a place where I can get something to eat.
I can’t do another weekend like this; I’m a wreck. Everything hurts. Incredibly tired. OK, part of that is the time change, but still - coming to work this morning felt more like something out of a nightmare than something I was actually doing in real life.
That may have as much to do with the destination as with my general state of mind, but… y’know, just saying.

Oh, in other news - I got a package from the metal clay supply people. It had one packet of clay in it. One. Ordered two. That’s frustrating. Sent them an e-mail thanking them for the quick shipping, but wondering whether the second packet would be shipping, too. So now I really DO have everything except the butane. Nervous, but anticipatory. :-)

OK, stuff to do. Not a LOT of stuff, but some, surely. Back on food track, today, anyway - whether I get back on the workout track tonight depends on how desperate the laundry situation is.
Have a great day, folks.
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