Here I Go Again

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

I’ve got a 9am meeting that I’m absolutely dreading today, so either this’ll be a short one, or I’ll have to come back to it later.
I don’t know why people invite me to meetings. I’m a peon. I’d rather you didn’t waste my time, and just came out of your meeting and told me what to do. Not that they’ve been giving me a whole heck of a lot to do lately, which is making me CRAZY. The day lasts three million years when you don’t have anything to do.
Today’s numbers, which are a bit disappointing, but still better than before I acquired the Body Cop (thanks to GIRANIMAL for the moniker):

Calories Burned (Target/Actual): 2263/2322. I beat it. Not by as much as I’d like, but I beat it.
Calories Consumed: BMF 1763, SP 1600/1683 Not too bad. I don’t think I’ve had SP take into account all the extra fitness work, so I may need to adjust that number. OK, I’ve just done that; I told it I’m burning 1200 kCal/wk. I actually burned over 1300 last week, but I’m not going to hold myself to that every week; I’m super-motivated now, but that’s likely to change. That did up my SP calories consumed target to 1630/day. I still went over it, but not as badly…?
Calorie Balance: 500 deficit/639 deficit. OK, actually, that’s pretty kick-a$$.
Physical Activity: 45 minutes (30 moderate, 15 vigorous)/1:05 (54 moderate, 11 vigorous). But part of that moderate was a 10 minute Boot Camp strength training DVD workout. I chose to do upper body. Some of it was easy peasy, some of it was no-way-in-h-e-double-hockey-st
(Look, it’s a family show; I’ve either got to censor myself or come up with clever ways to fake cursing.)
Anyway, I think for the easy peasy ones I need to up my weights (knew those CAP weights would come in handy!), and for the no-way ones I have to… um, no idea. There were arms-behind-you push-up things. I did try, but my arms and wrists just don’t readily go that way, and if you make me put them that way, you can’t make them bend or move. I’ll keep trying, but… ow. I don’t know if I was meant to move that way.
Steps taken: BMF 8000, SP 10000/8105. This new gig just doesn’t lend itself to a lot of motion. I’ll try harder.
Sleep: 8/6:19.
So. Dopey.
This time it was totally my fault, though. A friend from the UK sent me her DVDs for the sequel series to Life On Mars, called Ashes to Ashes. I still had 2 episodes of Life On Mars to get through, so I powered through them after my workout; it kept me up later than I should’ve been. Not by a whole lot; I was in bed by 10:40, which pre-Body Cop was pretty standard. I think it’s just that now that I know what it feels like to be more rested, I’m pining for it.
I think the 6 very tired-looking sheep on my phone are angry at me.
Coffee, don’t fail me now.
(Don’t worry – I switch to water as soon as I finish the first cup, these days. I’m a good doo-bee.)
It’s actually good I’m going to have to walk away and go to this bloody meeting; maybe I’ll be semi-conscious and able to think of something to write about when I get back.
And, as expected, there was no reason on this Earth for me to be there. Oh, no, wait – I had to be there so I could be told to order file dividers; that totally couldn’t have waited for someone to come out afterwards and tell me. That said… even though I WAS at the bloody meeting, someone STILL came to me afterwards and told me to order file dividers!
In case you were wondering… yes, my job is waaaaay beneath my skill/intelligence level. I continue to do this to myself knowingly and willingly; I don’t want to spent my free time worrying about work. Given choice, I’d spend as little time thinking about work as humanly possible. But the price is that I spend my days bored out of my skull. I have no particular interest in what I do, other than that when someone gives me something to do, I do it well. On the rare occasion someone gives me something interesting to do, like edit or format a document, or fix a computer because it’s too challenging to get IT to do it… that’s fun for me. Otherwise… dull dull dull dull dull. I’ve been with this company for 5 years. In that time, I’ve had 4 jobs. If the economy weren’t the way it is, I’d have had at least 3 jobs in different companies in that time. I get so bored, you see; the only way to retain any kind of interest in what I’m doing is to change jobs, and then there’s some challenge in learning what I have to do. But then I learn it. And it gets boring. And I change jobs. Ad infinitum.
Admittedly, when I started on this particular career path, more than a decade ago, I was spending most of my quality recreational time baked. It didn’t do wonders for my ambition. And the fact that it’s all I know how to do has kept me from really developing any ambitions, since. I’ve risen about as high in this particular hierarchy as I can. If I go any higher, I’ll have to do actual work and be expected to make sacrifices in the name of getting the job done. I don’t choose to do that. I either need to find a new career, or resign myself to a life of lateral moves and mind-numbing boredom.
I long to find something to do that I actually ENJOY. I know that’s incredibly rare, so I don’t really expect it to ever happen. The things I do for fun – make jewelry, write incredibly long, inane blogs about my not particularly interesting life, read, edit other people’s work – if I HAD to do those things, I wouldn’t want to do them anymore. I mean, yeah, I’m considering selling the jewelry. But I haven’t actually sat down to make oodles of it yet. There’s no pressure on me yet. Once there is… I’m guessing it’ll get a lot less fun.
I think I was just born to be bone-idle, actually.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t pay well. And I haven’t won the lottery or the Publishers Clearing House Sweepstakes yet.
So... in the interim... lame-a$$ jobs that require about 15% of my brain power.
If you could’ve been a fly on the wall for the teleconference I just had, with consultants who are providing us with an online portal so that people in other departments can track the status of what we’re doing, you’d have seen how it was spoon-fed to me like I was an idiot. Why there needed to be 5 people on the other end to tell me what I already knew, I don’t know. Why there needed to be a teleconference at all, when I was the only person at my company on the call, I REALLY don’t know. The only new thing they told me that I can now sort the documents alphabetically by doctor (which, since I don’t ever know who the doctor is, is kind of useless to me. It’ll probably be helpful to someone else, though), and as a “Power User,” I can now edit ON the portal, instead of having to edit Word docs, then send them back to the consultants so they could input the data (which was, about 6 times out of 10, wrong by the time it made it online, somehow). That was nifty. The rest of it was telling me things like, “And if you hit the Save & Close button, the synopsis will close automatically.”
Um, yes. I’d figured that out all on my own. Y’know, what with it saying Save & Close, and all. But thanks for the demonstration; that was fantastically helpful.
“The grayed-out areas that you can’t click into aren’t editable; the white ones in borders, that you can click into, are.”
Gosh, thanks. I’d never have figured that out. And I needed 4 of you to explain it to me, too.
And now you know way more about my job than you ever wanted or needed to know. At least I didn’t have a catering incident to describe to you today; consider yourself lucky.

I’d say I should stop writing and get to work, but I haven’t got any.

Tra la la.
Ages till lunch (I take it as close to 1 as I can push it; it makes the afternoon go faster).
So! The scale sang its siren song this morning, but I defied it! I did not step on. I do not know what I weigh today.
This in no way has to do with the piece of Endangered Species Dark Chocolate with Deep Forest Mint I had for dessert last night.
Oh, c’mon, it was Valentine’s Day, and it was 50 calories. Not going to regret that, I refuse on principle. Well, I do SORT of regret it, as it didn’t taste as good as I’d hoped. What can I say, I’m a milk or white chocolate girl; dark chocolate has never really been my thing. But that’s as may be; it’s a whole new world, and milk and white chocolate have little place in it.
I won’t say no place; I can’t always resist them. But I’ve had a jar of mini 3 Musketeers bars sitting on my desk since Christmas, and there’s one still in the jar. The old maid piece of candy has been there for weeks; it’s waiting for an emergency. So are the mini packet of M&Ms that’ve been in my drawer since… well, before August, I know that; I got them from my boss in my last department, and I left there in August. I’ve had a monstrous bag of white chocolate buttons sitting in my pantry for ages, as well. Do those go bad? I was afraid to open them, for a couple of reasons. One, they’re pretty high in fat, which is something that tends to make the tummy unhappy these days. Two, it’s a pretty big bag, and I was afraid if I opened it, I’d just go bonkers and plow through it like a shot. Not that this is a common behavior for me, but… well, there you go. That’s why it’s sitting unopened in my pantry.
ANYWAY, I did, however, succumb to the lure of the tape measure. As expected, not much loss, there; less than an inch. I wish I’d taken a boob measurement to begin with, though – I’m quite certain they’ve shrunk. They’ve been poking out the bottom of the bra I’m currently wearing for months, and today they’re staying put just fine. They’re always the first to go, when I lose weight; it couldn’t be somewhere USEFUL, like waist, or thigh. Oh, no. It has to be one of the only parts of me I’m perfectly FINE with being large. Further proof, if any were needed, that nature has a sense of humor.
OK, I’ve dragged this out as long as I feel comfortable doing; you’ve got other things to do with your day. If anything even marginally interesting comes up, I’ll be back. So… probably not today, then.
Have a great day, folks.
As always, thanks for letting me blather on.
Maybe I’ll start instituting a trivia game, or movie quote quiz, to keep it interesting. Then there’ll be a reward for plowing through. Not, y’know, a monetary one, or anything, but you’d at least get a sense of accomplishment out of it.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Ah! Got it. Well, I was being a little bit of a dunce ... or just in denial that other people can handle so many numbers with ease AND have the dedication to be so specific! Bravo! emoticon
    2653 days ago
  • JKM822
    1300 is what I burned via fitness, at least as far as SP tells me when I enter that I did X amount of disco dancing (not sure if that's the right choice, but aerobics doesn't seem quite right, either) and X amount of boxing, and blah blah blah, over the course of a week. The 2000+ number that the BMF gives me per day is including walking around all day, sitting down and eating, sleeping at night... it's every calorie you burn, just by living. Basically, it's your BMR, like SP gives you (and I'm assuming they use a similar formula to come up with the basic number), plus it being on your body to actually track how much energy you use doing things like typing up really long blogs. The last time I synced, just before lunch, I'd burned about 978 calories since midnight.
    Here's a very in-depth review from someone much, much more active than me, explaining how she uses her BMF to prepare for an Iron Man competition. As an FYI, she's got the Bluetooth version, which I do not. Someday, perhaps....
    The short version of how she worked it out is this:
    "I have found the device to be really very accurate, with the possible exception of biking. I have read a lot on this topic, and other folks appear to agree that it underestimates calories burned during biking and spinning. In general though, if I calculate out my Basal Metabolic Rate, and then add in the various activities I do throughout a day, I find that the monitor is very close to that projected number. But, I don’t have to do a bunch of math every day – I just let the monitor tell me what I’ve done!"
    So... there you go. I take it at face value; it gives me a number, and if/when I come in over it, I say yay!
    Yeah, not a fan of the loss of boobage. My only hope is that they won't shrink TOO much. As long as they stay a C, I'll be happy. I do miss my D's, but I don't miss the 205lb body that went with them. And I don't much miss the extra cost of a 44D bra, either. I'm very much looking forward to being able to shop in normal stores as opposed to Lane Bryant! Not that there's anything wrong with Lane Bryant, other than cost. Anyway, I'm currently hovering between a 38 and a 40C. I imagine it'll be a solid 38 in the very near future. Back in the old days, when I was below 160lbs (so, we're talking high school, here), I was a 36C. I was pretty much a 36C from the day I got out of training bras till the day I put on my first size 16. And size 16's were smaller back then. ;-)
    Actually, I'm not supposed to have chocolate at all, for the time being. It goes along with not being allowed to have coffee (which I ignore daily), and wine (which I only ignore @ once a week), and tomatoes (which I accept happily and have no problem with), etc.; it's a trigger for GERD. Since that telltale back-of-the-throat burn has been plaguing me again the last several days, I'm thinking I'm going to have to cut way back on coffee, even more than I already have. And I have. *sigh* So any potential love affair between me & dark chocolate is going to have to wait.
    I can't imagine actually preferring it, though!

    2654 days ago
    Hey, glad you found Body Cop an appropriate moniker. Happy to help! emoticon

    So, I'm a little confused about what it's telling you for calories burned -- at first I was going to beg for access to the universe in which you manage to burn more than 2,000 a day. But then you said you'd averaged 1300 last week (still impressive but far saner) ... sorry if I am being a total dunce about this, but what's that first reading it's giving you then?

    Sorry to hear about the girls shrinking already. I grieve my own till this day. emoticon What you call a sense of humor I call totally unfair and whine a lot about it!

    Finally, have hope for dark chocolate. I used to hate it but now prefer it.

    Hope the workday becomes more interesting! I can relate there on a lot of levels too.
    2654 days ago
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