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I've Lost My Mind... Care To Join Me?

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Tuesday, January 10, 2012

So it's been 10 days of on-plan eating with regular exercise and I'm starting to feel great again, aside from the copious farting. It's time to ramp up my exercise, quit making excuses and being afraid of stupid things. I need to kick things into gear and catch up on my mileage for the 2012 team.

I'm starting to get that old Jenn feeling back. I'm remembering how it felt to be hardcore, to accept no less than 6+ hours of cardio a week, doing kickboxing, swimming, eating super clean, weight training, C25K training, etc. I'm remembering what it felt like to be losing weight each and every week and moving forward like a weight loss machine. I remember, I'm almost there again and I like it. I like it a lot. It's a lot more fun to walk the walk and not just talk the talk.

I'm feeling motivated. I'm feeling higher than a kite on veggie fuel. No more "this is your brain on drugs" it's now "this is your Jenn on exercise and freggies!"

I'm so energized that I'm kind of twitchy and my podmates would tell you that I'm kind of having this ADHD level energetic, spazzy/ twitchy and extremely annoying thing going on. That is in addition to the revolting farts that keep sending me out of the cube to avoid gassing my peeps out. I'm a freaking merry ray of sunshine delight to be around today. WOOT WOOT!

I'm doing a gym-based sprint triathlon on Friday.

What's that, you may be asking?

Technically speaking, it's the "starter drug" of triathlons that gets people headed toward a life of freakish physical fitness like full length triathlons and Ironmans.

A sprint triathlon is, according to
750 meter swim followed by a
20 kilometer bike followed by a
5 kilometer run

So that's what I will be doing on Friday, except not in that order and inside a gym.

You can too. Want to share the pain? Find two friends and do a virtual relay. Or just pick a leg and do it, but I hear that misery adores company.

I feel a Princess Bride quote coming on.... "To the pain!"

Here are the rules:
**Show up at some point this weekend.
**Do the stuff listed above, alone or with others. Outside or in a gym. On Friday, when I post about this again (if I'm not dead) you tell the world all about how awesome you are (or your team awesome) as a comment... or tell the world how awesome you are on your own page... or both.
**Feel the awesome welling up within you and bursting forth in the form of a tri-awesome-sauce.
**Tell the world how awesome you are.

Since I'm doing it at a gym, I'm not going to count transition time. I will be transitioning in a locker room and that seems kind of silly and not at all like the fairly cool and frantic shucking of clothes/application of shoes that happens during real tri transitions.

The facts:

**I'm going to be kinda slow and that's OK, cuz I'm going to be way faster than the lumps watching TV on the couch.
**I'm going to be using a stationary bike and a treadmill instead of the great outdoors and that's ok, too.
**I'm going to whine a lot. Luckily, it will be silently in my own head, because no one wants to hear it.
**I'm swimming last because the last time I got on a treadmill while moist I ended up with 3rd degree inner thigh skin removal due to massive chafing. (I made up that 3rd degree thing, there is no such chafing rating system, I just say these things to amuse myself).
**I will share my times. Not because I think I will be fast, but because I think I will be faster next month when I do it again.

So, who is with me this weekend?

I know SOUTHPONDCAMP is in... who has a few hours they would like to spend exercising this weekend? Who is willing to do a leg as part of a cyber relay? Wave your hand if you want to be part of a relay!

Before you tell me how you are too fat, too old, too PMSy, or too something else, please keep in mind that I was 287 at my last weigh in. Preacher, this is the choir.

Pretty please don't make us suffer alone. Sniffle. Whimper. Surely you can swim, or maybe bike, or perhaps a quick little jaunty walk or maybe a nice perky jog? Maybe you're a full-blown nutbag like me and you are willing to give it a whirl?

Maybe you already the awesomesauce and this will be no big deal for you, and that's not just ok, that's freaking righteous!

It's not like you have to be in the same gym with me while I have brussel sprouts farts, it isn't THAT bad! So spread the word. Push your limits. Earn the official Spark 2012 Gym Sprint Tri Team Shirt. Oh wait, there isn't one. Oops.

Drumroll please!!!!

I now declare the Spark 2012 January Cyber Sprint Tri Open. Spread the insanity. I mean word. Spread the word.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • CJACK66
    I realize it's been a while since you actually posted this blog, but I just read it this morning...and man, am I glad I did. You have no idea how much you inspired today.

    I woke up this morning feely both crampy AND PMSy ('s a gift) and decided that today I would just lay low and cruise SP for inspiration. When lo and behold, I came across your blog.

    So, despite having worked out 5 days this week, I hoisted myself out of my chair, donned my finest workout togs (an old paint-spattered t-shirt and hole-y sweats) and jumped on the elliptical for 30 minutes. And I must say, I feel worlds better.

    Thanks for the kick in the pants I so desperately needed today. You rock!
    2261 days ago
  • OPTIMIST1948
    Read my 1/29 blog post. You have inspired me! (Not ready to do it yet, but eventually. I hope).

    Power to the crazy people!

    emoticon (This is the one that looked the most crazy)
    2271 days ago
  • PEONY721
    I was reading and thinking, hey, I want to do this!
    Then I remembered I don't actually know how to swim!
    2282 days ago
  • RIQUI1
    I am a little late for this one, but this sounds like fun! I wish I had someplace here to do the swimming part of it, as that would probably be my favorite. The treadmill could be done at home, but I have no bike. Hmmm... I wonder if I couldn't use this as an excuse to get more fitness equipment. The bike I can probably manage...I don't know how I will pull of the indoor pool! :)

    I read your blog upon finishing, as well!! Congrats to you! Should I figure out how to do this with you, I will keep watch for next month!

    Stay true to your goals! :)
    2286 days ago
  • TRABOLD8567
    2287 days ago
  • JWAYNE90
    So glad to see your blogging again! Youre a complete insparation to me!
    2288 days ago
  • BANDMOM2012
    How could I not look at this when it mentioned farting? You got to love the vegetables, beans and legumes involved in healthy eating emoticon
    2289 days ago
    Ha! I am so glad to hear someone else has the copious farting when getting back on the wagon.
    2290 days ago
    You in inspire me! emoticon emoticon
    2290 days ago
    I'll join you for the 5K run :)
    2290 days ago
    Awesome blog
    2290 days ago
    I don't have a pool but I will do the 5k on the treadmill tomorrow if it kills me!

    2290 days ago
    You are correct, you have lost your mind. But what a way to go!
    2291 days ago
    Spark 2012 January Cyber Sprint Tri Open...I am in! It will not be pretty...but it will a first and will be better next month! I started back at the gym on the 7th and I am already sleeping better, and a couple pounds are gone. This was just the motivation I needed. Thanks and Good Luck all!
    2291 days ago
    I think it's a wonderful idea! I'll try to cycle if I can see a counter on my little one.
    Go, Jenn, go!
    2291 days ago
    The 3rd degree comment and "no such chafing rating system" - LMAO! That had me on the floor! You're the reason I spend hours reading blogs - just to find one like yours! Inspiring, motivational and most of all - funny!
    Love it - thanx for sharing!!


    I'm in for the challenge!
    2291 days ago
    WOW! You rock! Way to get your butt in gear (in more ways than one) after your horrendous December meltdown. I for one will not be taking you up on your offer. Although I will be doing some exercise this weekend I am not up for killing myself. Thanks for the encouragement though- YOUR GREAT! (Yeah- imagine it in the Tony the Tiger voice cuz that is sooooo what I was trying to convey!)
    2291 days ago
  • SPEEDY143
    "copious farting" "revolting farts" "I have brussel sprouts farts" YOU sound jet propelled to me and more than ready for your Cyber Sprint Tri Open emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2291 days ago
  • YOMAMA128
    ALL RIGHT!!! Great to see feisty Jenn is back and kicking butt -- everyone's butt.

    Yeah I'm in!!! Won't keep a Sparker hanging


    Let's do it!!

    2291 days ago
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    2291 days ago
    If I have some extra time on Sunday, I may take up your offer.

    emoticon You are emoticon !
    2291 days ago
    Sounds great! I've been alternating 5k on the running trail and 18km on the bike since I started back this week . . . however, I am not sure if I am friendly enough with my bathing suit to put it on this weekend. Maybe I'll just complete the dry portion and cheer you on (virtually) from the side of the pool!
    2291 days ago
    750 meter swim followed by a
    20 kilometer bike followed by a
    5 kilometer run

    I have 3 broken toes on my right foot, but I can ride a recumbent bike. I need to check into pool accessibility. Have a treadmill in the house. Can't run with these toes, but I can certainly walk 5k. Based on my work schedule, I'll need to spread this over a few days... BUT, I WILL DO THIS. COUNT ME IN!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2291 days ago
    I don't have access to a bike or a pool, but I'm in for the 5K! Lets rock it! This was so inspiring! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2291 days ago
    That is AWESOME!!! :-) I am definitely in...although I don't have access to a pool - and even if I did I can't I'll have to think of something else in the place of the swim.....

    Love this blog!!!
    2291 days ago
  • GOIN4GR8
    I alom suffer from 3rd degree chafe on a regular basis--especially while sweaty! Ha ha--thanks for the great blog!
    2291 days ago
    2291 days ago
    I'm in. I will be doing mine on Friday cause I got to take the swimmer to a meet out of town. I won't be very fast on the run as it is last and my knees are not behaving..but I'm liking the push. My husband does sprint tris and I'm going to do this without tellling him what I am doing. It will knock his socks off. emoticon emoticon
    2291 days ago
    U are so awesome! I would love to try at least one of these next month. U are so inspiring and can't wait to see what's next.
    2291 days ago
  • REENIE131
    How cool! I can't join in this month, because the pool I'm going to be swimming in opens February 1st, but I'd love to join in next month!
    2291 days ago
  • JULIA1154
    The sprint triathlon's an interesting concept. I won't be doing it this weekend but could see aiming for it later in the spring. My crawl technique is embarrassing (at best)....

    I, too, am enjoying getting back to normal.
    2291 days ago
    2291 days ago
    Your blog is very inspiring! I have just started back on my healthy diet program. Although I have not started back exercising, I have been doing my January cleaning(like spring cleaning) and it is unbelievably good exercise. In fact, I can hardly stand upright tonight. every muscle is throbbing. I know I'll have a 3 or 4 pound weight loss this week. That being said, after my January cleaning purge, I'm looking forward to getting back to the gym. It made me very happy and excited to read your blog. It makes me remember how great I feel when I'm doing what I should be doing, and trying fun new activities.
    2291 days ago
    emoticon Jen IS back!!! emoticon

    Not that into swimming, and don't bike so no "tri" for me, but I WILL do a 5k this weekend (walking)... I might even do it twice just because! emoticon emoticon
    2291 days ago
  • SWEETP84
    I'd be in but there is no pool at my gym :( can I participate in the other parts though and maybe do an extra couple miles to make up for the swim?

    2291 days ago
  • SWEETP84
    Good Luck! And have a great time! that sounds like a great idea!

    2291 days ago
    Good luck, I am not there yet, i am pacing myself to survive to get to my goal! And yes eating well does make you fart a lot, good thing I work in a sewage treatment plant, i can just blame the work environment on the smell!!
    2291 days ago
  • MRSG942011
    Farts are good, it means you are getting used to more fiber! It will subside soon. I find staying away from Fiber One (for some reason makes me gassy as hell) and eating stuff with fewer ingredients, like AllBran with bananas in almond milk, makes a difference. Some of the more processed fiber I can't eat. And slowly increase it. Good luck!
    2291 days ago
    2292 days ago
    OMG I am so in!! I dont care how long it take me I want to finish it. Like you I would like to compare how much I improve next month. Let DO THIS!! I need something that will motivate me and I think this is just what I need!!

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    2292 days ago
    I'm on my 10th day of being back to the old-hardcore-eating healthy-weekly weight losing me too!! Feels GREAT. I feel like I need to give you a high five! ::high five:: keep up the awesomeness! I love the energy. The tri athalon thing scares me, but I totally am cheering you on from afar!
    2292 days ago
    This is the funniest but most inspiring blogs I have read on here. Please take that as a compliment. Not much makes me really laugh thee days other than Larry The Cable Guy. I weigh 50 pounds more than I should and I find that it is affecting everything...ambition, socializing, laughing...everything.
    I wish I you and I were neighbors so we could do all of this together. I live out in the woods of Northwest Wisconsin with my wonderful husband, 3 dogs and a cat.
    I find it hard to even go out among people we know because I don't want them to see how much weight I have gained in one year. I wish you the best, keep up your humor, it is great. Thank You! Kristy emoticon
    2292 days ago
    You go! What an inspiring story! I have to say that I too am starting to remember the old me! I love the feeling of knowing who I am and not giving up on myself! I am determined to stay motivated so others will see me on the outside the way I see myself on the inside!
    2292 days ago
    YAHOO!!! Love it!!! I am finding my groove after the holidays again too!!!
    2292 days ago
    2292 days ago
    2292 days ago
  • 4LOOPS
    good luck! I loved seeing a Princess Bride qoute!
    2292 days ago
    haha this was just awesome, and you're relay sounds like alot of fun! I'll be in on the swimming part :D

    And not gonna lie if i saw somebody dressed in their bike suit, going crazy on a stationary bike, complaining about how "the hills are so freaking steep...why are they this steep?!" I'd keep the conversation going lol better to join the delusion that fear it
    2292 days ago
    Your blogs make me giggle. And that's why I love them so much. Brussels sprouts farts are DEFINITELY the worst - hehehe.

    I will be running and zumbaing and playing soccer this weekend (all while sick - cough cough) so I'll be thinking about you doing your first tri!
    2292 days ago
  • JIVANA108
    I'm in for a run and bike ride indoors as well:)Saturday will rock! Great idea for a cyber team triathalon. Wonderful blog as always.
    2292 days ago
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