SOJOURNE
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The drive through fat a...

Monday, January 09, 2012

Everyone who is fat knows how lonely it can be. They know how fat is like an island being built around you and it can separate you from just being yourself. I am ready to get off this island, but once I am I will never, ever treat people who are still on it like I was yesterday. I'm still in tears just thinking about it.

My son had a friend over and my husband woke up early to clean house and do a number of other things. We had been real busy all morning making time fly by! He was hungry but I hadn't been to the grocery store yet. I had lean cuisine meals, but nothing for them. He asked me to go to Wendy's and I thought nothing of it. I went and ordered meals for my husband and my son and friend. At the drive thru is where it happened. I am just utterly embarrassed and need to get it out.

I made my order at the speaker and I make it a point to ALWAYS be polite and ALWAYS say please and thank you. I pull up to the window and the young man takes my money and he starts making drinks. He didn't shut the window all of the way and I hear this other male co-worker of his calling people names. Fat A double S specifically. The girl getting the bags ready tells him to hush she can hear you and points at me (they don't realize I see this because I'm acting like I don't at this point) and he says "I don't care, she's a fat a double s too. Look at her ordering all of this food". At first I was going to act like I didn't hear it, but my skin started burning as if someone slapped me and I couldn't keep quiet or they would think I was just crazy. My skin became red and my eyes welled up and I knew. I HAVE TO SAY SOMETHING. I asked to speak to a manager and I was going to be tough. I told myself "NO TEARS". I told the manager what was said and I said to her "Never in my life have I had something so horrific said to me". All she could do was apologize and she hadn't heard it because she was in the office with a delivery person. I told her I can't believe in this day and age people act like that. She said he was going to be fired, I'm sorry, blah blah blah.... they give me the food and I leave. That's when I fell utterly apart. I got home and my husband opened the door for me and saw that I was beside myself. When I told him what happened he started getting his shoes and he was going to go there. I told him I didn't want that. I don't want anything other than to be left alone..... So someone goes out of their way to say something ignorant to me and my defense is to put myself back on the island of shame. Not this time. Nope, I'm not going there. I'm not letting this hurt me worse than it has. I'm not going to let him get away with it. I'm not sure what I'm going to do but I don't want him fired. I just want them to know I'M not going to be messed with like this. I don't need to wear a shirt that says "I'm Trying to lose weight" for people to treat me with the respect I deserve. Anyone have any suggestions? emoticon
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  • TINNATEE
    Wow, this makes me mad too! People today don't think past themselves anymore! Where is the empathy or just plain old fashioned consideration for other people's feelings? I was brought up to respect others as well so stuff like this makes no sense to me. I'm sorry you were hurt by such ignorant people.
    2838 days ago
  • SOJOURNE
    Thank you for reading and yes, I learned to be assertive as a child (number 7 of 8). My siblings were at times the meanest things on earth so I grew up with a little thick skin but with one Achilles heal: my weight! I still haven't figured out what but I am trying to weigh my options. The managers "I'm sorry" and empty promises just don't seem to take away the experience.
    2838 days ago
  • DEELYNNE1
    Good for you for speaking up for yourself...I wonder why it is that in this day of "political correctness" so many people seem to still feel it's okay to denigrate those of us who are overweight. I think it would be perfectly appropriate for this guy to be fired. Maybe it would teach him a lesson that would be worth far more than his job is worth. And you have every right to assert yourself as you did. I say, "Yay for you!" I wish I'd learned to be assertive at a much younger age.
    2839 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/9/2012 12:35:18 PM
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