My A-HA moments
Thursday, November 10, 2011
I responded to a message board, but decided to add this as my blog today. If I ever need to refer back to it, for movitation or a little boost.
My A-HA moment was a drawn out one, over about 10 months, so this may be a longer post. It was last year in November when I went to the doctor's for an initial visit, after I found out I was pregnant. I stepped on the scale and it read 208! OMG! I thought, okay, its because I was hungry the little baby needed the food. Unfortunately, during that visit, I found out it was not alive, there was not heartbeat and I ended up miscarrying and needed a DNC. Yes, I was heart broken, but in January I decided since I didn't need to eat for 2, I would start eating better for just 1, ME. A-HA #1
I came back to SP and really was serious about this. I was tracking my food, and taking long walks with my little boy. By February, I had lost 10 pounds! This was from December to February. Then I started feeling bad. By bad I mean nauseous, tired, in pain. I knew it was the gall bladder stones I had been diagnosed with years earlier. So I really watched my fat intake and stayed away from any fried foods, oily foods. After a few weeks, I went to the doctors again, and the ran the same tests as years before. I had more stones! But by that time, it didn't really seem to matter what I ate, I felt awful. One doctor said it will eventually need to come out but just watch what I was eating. What a relief! So I went about my days and then 2 days later I went home from work with what I thought was the flu (that was a Friday) and stayed out for the next month. The following week I saw my regular doctor and she said my gall bladder had to come out NOW! It was getting much worse, and I was scheduled for the operation make arrangements to come in. All worked out well, though I still feel some uncomfortableness where the gall bladder used to be, when I eat too much or do eat fatty foods, . Phantom pain is what is called I guess. So after all this, I ended up losing more weight, mainly because I couldn't eat anything without feeling awful. So I slowing began eating regular meals. This was A-HA #2.
I was proud that I had lost 20 pounds despite my problems, for lack of a better word. Then work got crazy during the summer. I didn't have time to go onto SP, too much was going at home too. Then I found out I was pregnant again in May, but at my appointment in June it was the same thing. I miscarried over the next 2 days. I was depressed! I comforted myself with food. I heard the voice in my head saying this will make me feel better, its okay because of what I went through. I could tell I was putting on some weight, but all my clothes still fit, so I continued.
The family vacation to Disneyland at the end of July was great! Then I looked at the pictures of the trip. I couldn't believe how I looked! So I stopped looking. Then around my birthday in October, I was feeling good, and happier, so I decided to weigh myself. 200! OMG, I put more than half back on! I took a good look in the mirror and my boy and said ENOUGH!
A-HA #3 - Third one is the charm right!
I've lost 2 pounds since then.