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Tired but determined

Sunday, October 30, 2011

I posted earlier that I was super tired, and I really really was. I had literally given up. I just decided that I was so tired of feeling, well, tired, and that I would allow myself to eat whatever I wanted in hopes that it would bring my energy levels back up.

Well, it didn't. I ended up feeling even worse, I think. I posted in the SP forums about my tiredness issue, and got some remarks about the way I eat. It made me really mad, but I also felt really hurt. Don't these people understand how hard it is to do this? Being a vegetarian? Being freaking tired all the time? Addicted to sugar? I wrote a really long reply telling them all my excuses for why I was eating the way I was, and telling them how they hurt me by saying those things.

But before I could hit send, I closed the window. What good would come out of making excuses? My personal motto is, "A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." So instead of getting mad at what they said, I calmed myself down and really read it and took it in. Maybe I do need more protein. Maybe I should try getting rid of the sweet treats more (though I don't have many to begin with!). Maybe I should up my exercise more.

So I planned out my meal plan for tomorrow, focusing especially on more protein and fewer sugars. I adjusted my diet end date by a month an a half so now I'm afforded more calories a day. I upped my calories burned by 500 a week. I'm going to stick with this and see where it takes me.

And you know, I'm not going to be angry at myself if the weight doesn't want to come off. My family is naturally heavier set than some, and my grandma lived to 102!!! It's not that we're unhealthy, just pudgy. and that's not necessarily a bad thing.
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