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Patience (and persistence), Grasshopper

Monday, October 10, 2011

I felt like a big whiny baby earlier today because of all the back-tracking I've done on the fantastic progress I'd made. Yes, I injured my foot. But I didn't push myself to find some other form of exercise I would enjoy while I stayed off it. I had many excuses. I don't like to swim and the condo pool is tiny. I didn't want to go to the gym and lift weights. What's the point of doing crunches and push-ups at home? Blah blah blah. With no exercise, the stress and irritation had to go somewhere. Where did it go? In a bottle of wine. When I was doing cardio, I didn't want a glass of wine at night. Without cardio, I wanted two glasses every night to erase the day. Not to mention the debauchery of the weekends and consorting with unsavory characters with lots of bad habits of their own. So I undid all the progress I'd made. I let the foot injury totally derail me, and I immersed myself in unhealthy drinking, eating, and all-around laziness.

In the midst of feeling sorry for myself today for putting myself back to square one, I began catching up on blogs. I read some really terrific accounts of great progress, transformation, and stupendous achievements. You people are simply amazing. I feel so proud. And then I noticed my eyes tearing up. And my heart aching. I had missed so much. Everyone has come so far. And instead of sharing in the triumphs and perhaps having a few of my own, I let myself get sucked in to old habits and mind-twisting situations.

But there's not a damn thing I can do about the past months. I can do better from here on out. That's what I've got: what's ahead. I can whine about yesterday, or I can put my energy toward getting my fitness level back to where it was, and then continue progressing even further from there. Energy spent on whining is wasted energy. Energy spent lamenting mistakes of the past is wasted energy. I'm going to put my energy toward making better choices today, and every day from here on out. I will not let anything or anyone derail me. There may be setbacks, injuries, speed bumps, or even road blocks, but I will keep moving. And I am going to surround myself with positive people doing their very best to treat themselves well. It's contagious. Just like negativity. I choose positivity and happiness.

So after all my moping and self-recrimination, I laced up my shoes and went down to the river. I did 3.32 miles, walking only. I did C25k Saturday and Sunday, so I decided today I needed to walk and give my still tender foot a rest. Turns out I walked my three miles just a hair faster than I ran them yesterday. Go figure.

But I feel so impatient. I want to go farther. I want to go faster. I want my fitness level to be back where it was in January right now. But today, I made myself walk. And I'm not going to jump right back in and aggravate my injury. I'm making great progress. I can run again without hobbling around for two days after. I'm getting there. I felt good tonight. And tomorrow night I'll feel even better. I just keep telling myself to give it three months. In three months I'll have undone much of effects of the past months.

Patience, grasshopper. Patience. Patience and persistence. I'll get there.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Way to go Pam!! You're right on!
    I've had some backslide too, so we can face the next three months looking forward together! :-)

    *big hugs*
    2374 days ago
    A fracture can be such a de-railment -- I've had a couple of foot stress fractures -- so I can understand your frustration. You are smart to take it slow and progress as your foot gets stronger. Attitude is everything, and you got it goin' on. Love your spark background tile by the way. emoticon
    2380 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/13/2011 5:04:59 AM
  • BETHV10
    I've gone back to some old and bad habits as well over the last few months and I don't have a bad foot to blame it on. I had some family problems that derailed me because I let them. Obviously getting heavier didn't help the family problems and I know that..... but we all make mistakes. I'll we can do is get back on the horse and try! emoticon
    2382 days ago
    Whining is so yesterday. Cue Rocky Theme Song. Pam's back in da house!
    2382 days ago
    Keeping looking ahead. You can't change your past but you can change your future. Go girl!!! I believe in you. emoticon
    2382 days ago
    You're fantastic!!!!!! Love this!!!! Especially this: "And I'm not going to jump right back in and aggravate my injury." Good work, lady. :D
    2382 days ago
    Excellent blog! And, your words are especially resonating with me. I have backtracked a bit also and am struggling to get my mojo back. You're in a great place -
    2382 days ago
    Slow and steady wins the race... learning how to come back carefully from an injury, and how not to get derailed when you are hurting is very, very difficult. I've re-injured myself multiple times in the last 3 years because I couldn't master this!

    Sounds like you are moving in the right direction. Your positive attitude is what will keep you on the right track. HUGS!
    2382 days ago
  • ERIN4771
    we all get derailed from time to time, it happens...injuries are a pain in the *ss, and it sucks when you are having such great success, then, to have to stop a routine you have gotten used to is hard...the point is, you are back, we are here for you, thru the good and the bad, and it's time to just keep swimming my friend.... emoticon
    2382 days ago
    It's not how hard you fall. It's how high you bounce.

    2382 days ago
    Spamacious. I love you. You are back and ready to go baby. We so got this in the bag emoticon
    2382 days ago
    I'm super proud of you for remembering that you are worth this and for taking care of yourself.
    2382 days ago
    You got this! It is wonderful to have you back with us again.
    Slow baby steps still get us where we want to be, it just takes a little longer. Unfortunately injuries happen and you are doing the right thing listening to your body and walking when you need to.
    FYI, my walking was also as fast as my running. LOL not a great statement on my running...
    2382 days ago
    You can take your injury and either use it as a learning experience/moment or you can whine.
    You're taking the bull by the horn and putting yourself first, not whining and getting back on track!
    You are such a motivator yourself, it is GREAT to have you back.
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2382 days ago
  • MAGGIE805
    Awww, just having you back brings a smile to my face. Wasn't it Confucious who said "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step" or something like that. You have already taken one big, courageous step towards achieving what you have set out to do and you can do it. I know you can.
    2382 days ago
    You can do it Pam! This isn't irreparable.
    2382 days ago
  • REENIE131
    Remember, every step forward, no matter how small, is a step in the right direction. Keep going! You can do it!
    2383 days ago
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