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Sabotage - October 3, 2011

Monday, October 03, 2011

Sabotage, by definition is a deliberate action aimed at weakening another entity through subversion, obstruction, disruption, or destruction. Self sabotage then is just doing that to yourself.

I have been guilty of self-sabotage. I have been subverting my exercise, obstructing my journey, disrupting my schedule and destroying my diet. Not horribly, mind you, but I have been.

I have all these plans. I love the way thin feels and all that. But I have no follow thru. I really need to get fit, get ridding of my tummy. Lose 30-40 pounds.

I take my dog for a walk every day. But I haven’t really been running, I have been walking. I make excuses: not wearing the right sports bra, didn’t take my asthma medication, toe hurts blah blah blah… I bought a hula hoop, but didn’t put it together until today. I have all sorts of exercise videos, Wii workout stuff… but not doing a single one. And I can tell – my body and my joints ache. Change in weather? Possible. Laziness? Definitely.

I talked about focusing on my diet. Yes, I eat mainly healthy. I love fruits and veggies. I eat mainly whole foods. But there are moments… I want ice cream. I want dates (the fruit, but a date with my husband isn’t so bad either). I want chocolate. Guess what? Last week, I had my period. So, I was grumpy and wanting the non-veggie, non-fruit type food even more.

I love water. I love drinking water. I love taking showers. Have I been drinking my water? Nope. Have I been showering every day? Nope.

There was a lot of other stuff happening last week also, not just the spark stuff. We had wonderful visitors from back home for a couple days and the visit was great. They left on Thursday. My husband left for a work trip on Thursday. Our new friends on our new street moved to Chicago on Thursday. Thursday was a difficult one.

So… I was/am going through a little depression. Sabotage.

We just moved to Northern Virginia due to my husband’s job relocation. We left my family, our friends, the kids’ friends. We moved at the end of June. It is now the beginning of October. I still have rooms to organize. A few boxes left to unpack and put away. My plan was to work an hour in each room. One room per day, until it got done. Have I been doing it? Nope. Sitting on my derriere catching up on movies and tv shows that I really don’t care about. Me. Really. Sabotage.

Have I been cooking healthy food for the kids? Yes. Have I been eating? No. Not hungry, unless it is really full of good and nummy Swiss chocolate. Luckily I don’t have any in the house. But guess what? The scale was not my friend. Yes, it was THAT time of the month, but dang… I want to see some progress, even if I don’t put all the effort that my body seems to require.

I have errands to do today. But I am waiting for a DHL delivery. Can’t go into the shower, because I don’t know when they are arriving. Can’t go for a walk with the dog, because I don’t know when they are arriving. Excuses. So, I’m blogging while catching up on TV shoes on Hulu. Fun, eh? Yes, laundry is going, beds are made, dishes are done, and the hula hoop is put together. But I am sitting on my derriere.

For now, I guess that’s enough. More to come. Hopefully I can kick my patootie and get back into my groove.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You're in the right place (SparkPeople). Sounds like you are about to turn a corner & start focusing on your health. I have confidence all will improve!

    Here's a great motivational article http://www.dailyspark.com/blog.asp?
    2042 days ago
    Hi Julie, I'm late checking in. I read your blog when you posted it, but somehow never found the time to respond properly. (My life has been and continues to be a crazy mess. Actually, my son's life is the crazy mess, but as a mom I find myself right in the middle of my kid's screw-ups...)

    I can only imagine that this move uprooted you somewhat terribly. And as moms we always make sure that our family is okay first, before we even begin to think about ourselves. I hope you've begun to find your bearings again.

    How's the unpacking coming along? Maybe you can set your goal to 30 minutes instead of an hour. It's easier to get started if the time commitment is shorter.

    Maybe joining a gym is not a bad idea. Great place to get your exercise, and you'll meet new people. Especially if you take a class: yoga, zumba, ...
    Plus, it'll renew your sprits and get you out of the house. It's a win win win win!!!

    Exercise is my #1 weapon to keep my sanity and keep my stress level down.

    I do what you do when I get a bit depressed - I just sit and stare at the tube mindlessly. Netflix makes this even easier. Well at least I can now choose what I want to mindlessly watch... :)

    Hope you're doing well.
    2407 days ago
    I'm sorry you've had a tough time. Moving is hard. Friends moving is hard. Losing weight is tough. I pray you will be encouraged and find strength to move forward. emoticon
    2415 days ago
    Sometimes when we do the rest follows. Don't give up. Keep doing. Build on your successes. Put it on your calendar and stick to it. I live in Northern VA and there are lots of gyms and boutique gyms. Find one and join. Get someone there to kick your butt into shape. Let me know how I can help.
    Good to have you sparking.
    2425 days ago
    Here's a patootie kick. emoticon I need one too. Just can't seem to keep my mouth closed. Doing lots of exercise, but eating anything easy to grab.

    Here's to Wednesday. I eat only what I should, you try out that newly assembled hula hoop. Whatcha think??
    2425 days ago
    You will get back into your groove. Moving is tough. I gained weight with every move when I was younger. Now... I'm not moving off this farm until I'm so old my kids have to move me! Focus on what you really want to do and get that in check, then move on from there. You can do it!
    2426 days ago
    you will
    2426 days ago
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