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Mysterious change in behavior

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Each time I have been successful with behavior change and weight loss I had a certain "feeling" that I have never been able to identify. It is an ease and contentment that leads to doing what I need to do when I need to do it. The first time I lost any significant amount of weight, I remember the feeling of the "off" button being pushed while I was eating. I would be eating, and then I would feel this desire to stop eating. Simply like an "off" button had been pushed. My friend described it as knowing when you're full, but that's not it. I have felt "full" and stopped eating (and sometimes continued to eat, knowing full well I was overeating). This was different. It was my brain stopping me without my choosing to stop. I never was deprived by this off button--I ate all I needed to to remain healthy-- but I was losing weight because it was making me stop eating when I should.

I can't find that button anywhere.

I recently had some health issues pop up--gallstones, arthritis in both knees, a torn meniscus in one knee, vomiting and nausea from the gallbladder issues--and some bad habits have returned. The only workouts that I have continued doing are my twice-weekly 1/2 hour training sessions that are now limited to my upper body/core. I know I need to trade in the elliptical and treadmill cardio sessions for swimming, but I hate the time it takes to get the same workout, not to mention the extra showering, shampooing, packing of bags, washing of swimwear (handwashing each time as opposed to tossing workout clothes into the hamper) and waiting for a lane to swim in, etc. So my 5x week workouts and 2x week training sessions have whittled down to the 2 training sessions-- I feel like a slug. Rather than suck it up, biting the bullet, and just doing what I need to do, something in me kinda gave up. I eat A LOT, and usually way too late at night (I tallied last night's "binge", and it was 1350 calories between 8 and 11 PM--prior to that, I had stuck to nutritious foods and 1500 calories for the day). I don't get enough sleep. I'm not drinking enough water. I work FAR too much. I eat in front of the TV... IN BED! Talk about taking bad habits to the absolute limit! And I can't find that off button. My behavioral "off button". My beloved, natural, self-control-without-deprivati
on, off button.

Today is so close to the first day of fall (Friday?). The weather is BEAUTIFUL. I am going to change shoes right now and go for a gentle walk outside (gotta baby the bum knee for now). The leaves are changing, and I have 1/2 hour left of my lunch hour. Should be quite pleasant.

If anyone has some ideas for cardio and for lower-body strengthening that is safe for arthritic knees and torn meniscii (Sp?), please leave me a note or e-mail me. Thanks!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I know of this "off" button you speak of. I have been enjoying it for about 6 weeks, but all of a sudden, this week, I can't find it!
    1970 days ago
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