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Eating and eating and eating...

Friday, August 12, 2011

It's appropriate to say that I have had an incredibly stressful couple of weeks with my friends illness, by peeps mom diagnosed with the big C and the additional emotional meltdown of my cat getting sick. I swear the vacation I so richly deserved was over shadowed with the drama that has become my new normal.

But what I found of late is that though I have tried to keep my choices healthy and my eating in control, I find myself eating so fast and literally scarfing my food without really tasting it. It is almost like a terrible chore that needs to be done quickly and without thought. Like washing the floor.

I find this odd because I love food and it's that love that managed to get me to this overabundance of fluffiness. I was eating my sandwich at job #2 last night and I was half way done, not enjoying it at all but was stuffing it to get it over with.

I mean what's up with that? What's the point of eating if I am not going to enjoy it? I need to lose weight so why eat if I am not hungry? Since when do I need to suffer to eat? I find it so weird.

Obviously I am emotionally eating but if I am not going to enjoy the food, why not make it something low fat and low cal that I don't really like anyway? Makes more sense to eat "diet" food if I am not thinking as I eat a ham and cheese on whole wheat.

If I am not tasting a chocolate chunk cookie, I may as well be eating celery.

Funny how these epiphanies present themselves when we least expect them. I ended up tossing my sandwich... then ate 3 cookies when I got home.

Emotional eating is not just about the good stuff.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Emotional eating is the worst. I am right there with you. I think you are at the point of doing most things on autopilot though. You have a lot going on right now and sometimes in times like these all we can really do is put one foot in front of the other and use our friends for support. The tree is here for you. I am here for you. Hugs!

    2471 days ago
    Epiphanies are some wonderful things, aren't they, Luce? LOL Hope things will settle down for you, at some point, but can certainly understand all that you're going thru and that it isn't real likely, at least in the near future. Keep on truckin', gf, what doesn't kill ya makes ya stronger.....or so they say.......
    2473 days ago
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