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New challenge. One Size down by October 21.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Hello everybody! It has been over a month since I've updated and that makes me both sad and kind of triumphant. In a way I saw Spark as a part of my life that helped to guide me towards being independent and continuing my lifelong journey of health. But I also miss it all the time and miss the community-feel of it. Today a client asked me if I used Weight Watchers or a certain program to lose the weight and I said no I used a website. I told her the name of it and she was looking at it on her phone while I cut her hair. And it just made me feel reminiscent and made me want to come home!

So anyway, there isn't much to update other than I am still maintaining. Summer has been hard on me and although I still work out 6 days a week, my eating habits are poor. I feel like I can never have both. I either am bored and hate my exercise routine but am eating right, or I'm exercising like crazy but eating crap. I also think I am back on here because I had my first actual BINGE in like 2 months. I felt like an addict who needed to go to a meeting. I've started improving in the past few weeks the quality of my food. Because for about a solid month I ate out almost every night and ate ice cream almost every day. But this month I have cut back and am making more meals at home. Last night I made myself a lunch at home, a beautiful salad with grilled chicken, cucumbers, tomato, and almonds and I just felt so proud of it that it made me feel like I needed to get back into my habit. School starts soon so I want to be back in the swing of eating healthy and packing food because my schedule gets crazier.

So I decided something yesterday. I am a size 8 right now. My struggle is, I'm a size 8 everywhere but my belly. My butt and legs fit the pants beautifully but because I have a belly they are always just that tiniest bit too snug. But if I go to a ten, the waist is ENORMOUS and the legs are even bigger. I got frustrated shopping yesterday because I felt like I'd lost ALL this weight and I'm still having struggled with clothes? I know it's because of my proportion and not my weight. And theres one or two stores where I KNOW i'll have luck and that I just have to know not to disappoint myself in other stores. But it also made me realize I am on the brink of losing another size. When I am good for a week I do become a six and then I eat crap and I go back to an 8. So I decided that I want to be a size 6 by October.

Why October? We are going back to Florida for our Halloween Horror Nights at Universal. And this time we are doing Epcot for the food and wine festival. And I just decided it's a good deadline to give myself. Because I know I can do it. I've been wanting to shed the last ten pounds for months but I decided not to do it with the scale. I am buying a tape measure and doing it with that. I do so much weight lifting I cannot depend on the scale. So I have been putting together core exercises along with my usual strength and going back to some Jillian Michael's dvds for reference because EVERY time I did one of her DVDs I lost a size. So that's my big goal right now.

Other than that I just want to stay how I am. I feel good most of the time. I am trying not to get down on myself and trying to love myself. It gets a little easier every day but I still feel like that fat girl. And I have to learn to give myself room to breathe because I get so hard on myself for indulging.

I missed you all and can't wait to get on all of your blogs and catch up!!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • SILLYHP1953
    I haven't been reading blogs for a few months; been logging on most days just not reading or writing blogs. I think the stomach area fat is the hardest to lose because no exercise works on it, just food choices. But you are smart and determined and you will get it figured out. Your trip sounds fun! Good luck on your challenge.
    2745 days ago
    Glad to see you back here and am happy to hear that your summer is going well! I'm with you on the tummy front! I am determined to get a flat stomach! I still have about 15-20 lbs to lose before I can get there, but I'm thinking of starting Jillian Micheal's six week six pack and maybe that'll help! Sounds like a great goal, I know you can do it! emoticon
    2779 days ago
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    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

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