LSPIZZA
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Why are some women so unsupportive to other women?!

Saturday, August 06, 2011

So my first triathlon is this weekend. And the weather isn't going to be great. Rain. And the surf is going to be high. But I'm ready. And I'm proud of myself for how far I've come. And I had such a victory this week! I easily slid into size 8 Jean shorts. Which I only tried on because they were on sale and there were no 10s. I have never been a single digit size before (and this is for real, right, jeans that aren't even tight make it for real!) in my adult life!

So I go pick up my race packet for the triathlon. Now I have quite a few races under my belt - mostly running, mostly co-ed. This is a women's tri. When I moved to the woman giving out the shirts, she asked for my size. I had ordered large. I am a medium these days :), but I like loose workout clothes and this is a tech shirt. She immediately told me they were running small and I might want an XL or even XXL. Really? Really? Gee thanks.

I ran a women's only 5 mile race a few months ago and had another one of these kinds of demoralizing experiences. A woman completely amazed that I was participating (who finished 20 minutes after I did, by the way).

What's up with that? Fit people come in all sizes! It was nice to get the tip on the sizing but I would never tell another woman she is an XXL. I would never even venture a guess. Why can't some women just be happy for other women instead of being snide? They were being so nice to the stick thin woman who was asking a million questions because she is sooooo obviously afraid of the ocean. Size bias even at a triathlon for women. Sigh!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LSPIZZA
    Thanks everyone for all your nice, helpful comments!

    I did it! I finished my first Triathlon - a sprint tri - in 1:29:35. Under and hour and a half. Woo-hoo!! Very middle of the pack but that was more than okay with me. And what a wonderful bunch of women! So wonderful to each other. It was a tough day - VERY rough ocean, drenching downpour on part of the cycle and then the sun came out to steam us on our run. And the women all shared stories and cheered each other on - it was great!
    2533 days ago
  • BEATLETOT
    Maybe the first lady was only meaning that the sizes are running a little small, so if you ordered (and therefore presumably wanted) a large, then maybe the large they provided isn't what you wanted. Maybe she noticed it when she opened the boxes and told everyone who walked up. She probably was so busy passing out T-shirts, she didn't have time to mentally assess each participant who walked up. I saw on Dr Phil once, "You wouldn't care what other people thought of you if you knew how rarely they did." She may have just been trying to be nice.

    Now the other lady, I don't know, but I'd give the first one the benefit of the doubt.
    2535 days ago

    Comment edited on: 8/6/2011 3:12:49 PM
  • EVOLVEFISH
    Yeah. Women are regarded as supportive and nurturing. Some women are supportive and nurturing of everyone. Some women are supportive and nurturing of men or children, but not other women. Some women are neither supportive nor nurturing. Guess we come in all flavors. Unfortunately there are lots of the ill-flavored ones out there. They probably won't be supportive and nurturing no matter how thin you are. But THEY DON'T MATTER. What matters is you and how you feel and how you see yourself and that you know you are fit and getting fitter by the minute. And, it also matters that you are supportive and nurturing, even when others aren't.

    emoticon
    2535 days ago
  • GRYPHON55
    Some women can't get over being judgemental about size, it's their insecurity. Don't be like them, just wave them off and forget about them!

    I have to say that my true running friends, both true runners and true friends, don't give a rat's *ss if I am thin or heavy, and they have seen me both. They are supportive and encouraging and just happy I'm out there doing something with them. Hope you find some of those kind of friends so you can ignore the snide, stupid people.
    2535 days ago
  • CITYZOZO
    go girl.. you rock, the sour pusses are a pain in the butt, i experience the same garbage.. shine like you've never have before.. good luck! good to get this out of head... big hug!
    2535 days ago
  • PUDLECRAZY
    You go, Girl! Don't worry about other people and their issues. It is sad that women are raised to be so insecure that they feel they have to compete with other women instead of bonding and cheering them on. Keep surrounding yourself with support friends of both genders and let the sour pusses live with their own bad attitudes.
    2535 days ago
  • THISYEARSMODEL
    Maybe she was jealous because you were a participant and she was stuck working the event?

    Yet another illustration of why, outside of SP, I can't stand having women as friends.
    2535 days ago
  • ALIHIKES
    I'm impressed with your success and smaller size, and ability to compete in a triathalon! emoticon

    Don't let any negative strangers get you down, and best wishes in your triathalon
    2535 days ago
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