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Until We Meet Again

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

At this point my friends, I can not...or rather am choosing not to keep up with SP. I need to refocus more intensely on my own life, survival and find my motivation again.

Fracturing my pelvic last year, really through me for a loop and not being able to exercise for 6 months was challenging. The fact that I was forced to get a 2nd job and worked 90 hr/wk between both jobs, was devasting for me; emotionally, physically and mentally.

I've cut down on my 2nd job work hours, but lost the fight in me to get back up and work out like I was, or EVEN attempt to get my butt to the gym (free). It's gone, kaput, gonzo.

Not gone forever....just misplaced.

I don't know if I'll EVER ride a bicycle again out in public. The fear is overwhelmingly terrifying for me and that emotion makes me upset with myself for allowing such a weakness to engulf me.....hahahah....I say this and YET, I'm out riding my Harley!

August 1st is my Transformation Day. I am going to make a schedule of my training, start counting my calories, food input, exercise minutes and moniter my weight (I don't even OWN a scale).

Financially I will finally be back on my feet by August and not have to worry if I should buy a roll of TP or stock up on food from the Dollar Store...HA Food....WHAT A JOKE.

Right now....it PAINS me to get all the group updates, and SP messages, knowing that I'm a "Poser" and not a participant. That being said, I'm going to remove myself from the daily emails that SP sends out. I wont be checking my page, and am deciding if whether or not to remove myself from SP all together....still not sure.

If anyone wants, needs or desires to get a hold of me...here's my email address:

Hopefully I'll be back, better than ever, with the strength to plow through it once again.
P.S. Here's the most recent picture of me....Thankfully, I am sitting down and you aren't able to view the regression of the body composition.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I am up in the middle of the night reading this, Deb. Life has a way of kicking our butts, but I hope you are feeling and doing much better. The struggle is so difficult at times and I truly do understand where you are coming from. When I broke my back several years ago, it did kick me in the arse, too. I have a lot of pain from arthritis starting to set in and I didn't have pain one before. It's surely different. We have to keep at it. I haven't been on spark the way I should either, but make myself hold on here. Take care, my dear, and I shall pray for all who are struggling to do better......both physically and mentally.
    Prayers go out to you today. I'm sorry I just read this tonight, but it's never too late to keep trying. I know that you will.
    xo MaryAnn emoticon
    1970 days ago

    Comment edited on: 11/27/2012 3:18:16 AM
    I can't believe I am now seeing this! Will sent you an email doll! Miss you and hope you are doing well. emoticon
    2410 days ago
    Its all good Girlfriend;) I too know the struggles too well. When you come back we will all be here. I myself have a hard time anymore keeping up with SP due to my mom being sick so much,and school. So I can relate :) Iz feelin ya! Hoping it gets better for you soon ox. Hey I have your number and we will always stay in touch Pretty lady! ox emoticon
    2445 days ago
    You just take care of you for now and we will be here for you.

    emoticon emoticon
    2472 days ago
    Hey Debie
    Sometimes we have to refocus and take care of ourselves.
    It doesn't matter if you are not active on SP, nowt wrong with that, just be happy, totally understnd emoticon

    Will miss you emoticon
    2472 days ago

    Comment edited on: 7/14/2011 3:18:25 AM
    Hey, Debie, I wondered where you'd got off to. You know, we've all been there, with so much to do and not enough time to do it. Letting go of the workouts... yup... been there, done that. You do what you need to do to get yourself back to where you want to be. I will miss you if you go, but I sure do understand.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

    You take good care of yourself!! And we'll see you when you get back!!
    2473 days ago
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