Fear of gym's...
Friday, July 08, 2011
I have always had a fear of gyms.. 3 years ago I bought a membership to a local gym that had a woman's only section. I did expect that I would meet and see other over weight woman there. After 3 weeks I was still the largest one! Only perfect dainty girls who read a magazine while walking a normal pace on a treadmill for 20 min and left. I was jealous I'll admit! Every time I went I hated the mirrors because of how I look when I work out hard ( beet red face, sweaty and chub jiggling ) and mostly how everyone is checking each other out. I always got negative, very self conscious and embarrassed of my body. The fat girl on a treadmill...
Today, I went to a Gym. No woman's section, lots of mirrors and I got enough anxiety that I procrastinated for 2 hours today. When I got there, there was not another soul and I had the gym all to myself, I went hard on cardio machines for 1 1/2 hours :) I feel great!
When I thought about how much I let that silly fear of what other people thought of me control my actions, I was ashamed.. If I continued 3 years ago I would have not been a fat girl on treadmill today! I also would have put the 2 hours wasted on my day off to good use!
I am proud of myself that I took a step forward and was ready to face my fear. I am worried that I will fall back into negativity when there will be people around!
Am I the only one who feels like this? If you also do I would love for you to introduce yourself!