Just live your life....
Friday, June 17, 2011
Every so often I tell myself to write a blog I just never get around to it. I sit on Daily Spark every day reading all the newest articles. I swear I've read every single article on that site. And I drift towards the community on Spark but something always distracts me.
I guess I wanted to write because I know that this journey never ends and it's a really good thing for me to have people to share it with. I try to look at every day as an individual journey. Some days are an easier journey and others are harder. Some weeks are better than others. Since I returned from my vacation, which I can say was amazing, I feel like I've been doing well and eating better than I was before I left. Vacation was a HUGE stepping stone for me, venturing out in public in a bathing suit and wearing sexier clothes than I've worn in a long time. It gave me a little bit of a different perspective.
Before I left I had had a very nice conversation with a personal trainer at my gym. I don't believe a personal trainer is ESSENTIAL for healthy weight loss, maintenance or strength training. But they have great insight and can help those who need that guidance. I talked to him because I was curious what my body fat percentage was. I had gotten it taken in October and it was 27 and when I got it done 2 weeks ago it was 26.5. He told me that for all the work I was doing it should have lowered a lot more than that. Now I also know that their job is to sell their training services and sometimes putting down your own efforts is their way of making their service look very good. But when I told him what it was I was doing and about the goal I had originally set to run a half marathon, he said that I am actually stripping the muscle from my body with all my efforts. He told me my heart rate when I do cardio is way too high and it's defeating all of my strength training efforts. I told him the amount of protein I was eating and other parts of my daily food intake and he said I wasn't eating enough. So it really gave me a lot to look at. I knew I had been doing too much but something in my mind wouldn't let me back off. Now that someone who does this professionally has given me this insight, it really changed my perspective. I told myself that vacation would be my rest, and when I came back I would approach it differently.
When I got back my major goal was to aim lower with my heart rate. I usually tried to keep it at 165, so when I worked out when I got back I tried to keep it at 150. I decided strength training is something I will do 2-3 days a week and back off a little on what I was doing, increasing reps and lowering the weights. Why did I need to be a weight lifter? I want to stay toned and strong and increase my abilities but also live my life. I told myself I will not spend more than one hour at the gym. If I am doing strength and cardio, I do 15 minutes of strength and 45 minutes of cardio. Before, I would let myself do an hour sometimes more. But now I realize working out MORE doesn't guarantee me anything. I'm exhausting my body. Since I started this new plan, I definitely feel better. The gym was never daunting but there were a lot of times I started hating it. Now I don't mind it because I know it's only 45 minutes. I feel like I have better control now.
I do realize I have control and obsessive compulsive issues and I definitely acknowledge that now. Food wise because of this less psychotic way of thinking about exercise, food has become slightly easier to control. I let myself have those extra calories I never used to let myself have. I have several whole eggs instead of only whites. I am trying to put more spinach into my breakfasts. I let myself have a piece of toast with breakfast and use a thin or a wrap for lunch. And brown rice is becoming a staple in my dinners. It's a challenge to go from completely avoiding carbs to allowing the healthy ones in. It's a control issue and I am trying to get ahead of it. But I feel better now about the choices I am making.
Anyway that's my update. I'll post soem pictures from my vacation. It definitely helped me realize how I look now is how I should picture myself. it's a process.