As most of my Spark friends know and have heard me complain, I have no butt. I know, I know, I shouldn't complain, but why oh why can't I just keep the lil bit I got? Trust me, I've heard it all, "Girl, you must have been taking those noacetol pills." (No-ASS-at-all) "It's a good thing you have hips because you would look just pitiful!" Yeah, I know. "Maybe you should stick with A-lined skirts." I like jeans. "Have you considered getting that Brazilian butt lift?" I'm anti-surgery for cosmetic reasons; not to mention I don't have that kind of money to be blowing on booty implants when there are way to many stilletos that need good homes! Did I mention I love shoes?
I've tried various exercises to tighten and firm, lift and sculpt - butt (pun intended) trust me, there is NO amount of firming, lifting or sculpting something that is just NOT there! As much as I'm enjoying many of the oddities that comes with weight loss (armpit shrinkage, collarbones) the disappearing act that is happening to my derriere and other valuable assests is beginning to pose quite a little problem.
You see...it looks like I've shat my pants. See examples in white jeans below.
(Bridal dress fitting in March - the dress has come in and it way too big all-over, plus it was fitted for someone who must play for the LA Lakers! I'm somewhat tall, but dang, do I appear to be 7 foot 3?
I'm finding unless I wear my pants like I applied them with a paint roller, it looks like I have (DPS) Droopy Pants Syndrome. Now, I've been wanting to get back into my skinty jeans for as long as I can remember. (I told yall about my skinty jeans right?)
See example below.
Here's how they fit a few months ago: (Um, you may not want to be eating your meal while viewing these...ya may lose your lunch...just sayin'.)
I wasn't even able to close them!
After a couple months of hard work, I got them closed! (Yay!) But it wasn't pretty! That poor button is holding on for dear life!
After one MORE month, I was able to not look completely horrendous in them... no muffin top!
So, anyway back to my point.
Wait, do I have a point? (Sorry, ADD kicked in) Oh yes. Do my fellow Sparkers know how those pants with the built in booty work? I was wondering if I should invest in some built-in-badonk. Now, I don't wanna look like I belong in a Sir Mix-A-lot video (Baby Got Back) I do however want my back parts to match my upper parts. (I'm losing "the girls" but I had some to spare, so I'm really not complaining, just explaining.)
What would YOU do?