PARTICLEGIRL22

SparkPoints
 

Emotional Meltdown

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

I just finished looking at pictures from the devastation in Joplin, MO. So many people lost so much. It’s hard to even contemplate the horror and loss that the town’s residents have to deal with. This comes just after all the horror in Mississippi and Alabama. It really makes my little break-down last night seem stupid and selfish. It’s so stupid and selfish that I can’t bring myself to blog about it. Let’s just say it involved a screaming toddler, two hours of sleep, lots of sobbing (on my part) and deep insecurities about my ability to be a good mom to my son and a good wife to my husband.

What I will say is that a lack of sleep and a lack of sanity are wreaking havoc on my food intake. As an emotional eater, the food is winning today. I’m trying but I’m having a hard a time fighting the overwhelming desire to consume a full sized bag of Doritos, a carton of Ben and Jerry’s and a bottle of wine. I want to curl up under a blanket and stare at bad reality TV instead of lacing up my sneakers and going for a run.

Simply put, I just want to sit around feeling sorry for myself instead of actually putting in the effort into feeling better.

I’m trying to fight it. My gym bag is next to my desk, waiting for 4PM. I messed up on breakfast but my lunch was within range. I’m checking Spark frequently (while working…don’t tell anyone) in hopes that everyone’s positivity will rub on me. I’m trying. I really am. But I just don’t want to.

Hopefully tonight will be better and a few more hours of sleep will turn things around. I promise a more positive blog tomorrow.
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • BROWNJB0
    Sleep deprivation is serious. I remember when Samson wasn't sleeping well (and I wasn't sleeping well) I had full blown temper tantrums where I was kicking and screaming like a toddler. It will pass... you will be able to get some rest and return to your normal, sane self again soon.
    3160 days ago
  • MIRACLELOVE77
    thanks for reminding us about the devastation. sadly, it's easy to forget when it's 'so far from home'. :(

    And this healthy lifestyle is about your whole lifestyle, sleep included! Don't forget to take care of yourself by getting rest as well! I know I get crazy emotional and stressed when I'm low on sleep!

    Good for you for recognizing that your emotions trigger unhealthy eating, and good for you for trying to resist those temptations! Hopefully blogging helped alleviate those cravings a little, and that's AWESOME that your gym bag is right there ready to go!

    And don't worry about your 'negative' blog (really to me it didn't sound negative, it sounded real and like you're a fighter!), we all have our hard days and it's so helpful to let it out :)
    3166 days ago
  • AWESOMECAROL55
    Lack of sleep will make do all kinds of stuff you don't normally do!!! A year ago March I ended up sleep deprived..stressed at work..physically sick!! I wound up in the hospital. Get some rest, relax, try not to watch too much depressing stuff on TV...and start over tomorrow!It's a new day!! the exercise will make you feel better & better about yourself!!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

    Carol
    3167 days ago

    Comment edited on: 5/24/2011 4:15:37 PM
  • PATTI_SP
    Sleep is key! Hang in there! Spark is a great support system, I wish I had had something like it when my kids were little! And yet, I made it through!!! You've got great goals, and great reasons to push for them! emoticon
    3167 days ago
  • LHIEBEL
    Hang in there--I am not an emotional eater--but when I am tired--I am hungry and all I want are carbs!!! Your body craves the food and carbs because it is tired and wants some energy! Give yourself a break and just keep doing the next good thing for yourself--it is all about small steps and overall consistency....
    3167 days ago
  • SUZWARNR
    You have a right to your feelings and your emotions. It's not your fault what happened to the people in Missouri. It's okay to feel bad for what happened to those poor people, but it doesn't mean that you have to minimalize your feelings for what's going on with you. I hope you're feeling a little better by now. I'm sure you know that you're a great mom. Sometimes you probably need a reminder from someone now and then. Get that workout in. You'll feel much better after.
    3167 days ago
  • MYLIMITLESSLIFE
    Having a miniture melt down is ok...everyone needs one. Just remember "that exercise makes you happy...and happy people don't kill their husbands" - Elle Wood- Legally Blonde.

    Just regain focus. You strong. Your body deserves good food, and exercise it needs. :-)

    Remember tomorrow is a new day....
    3167 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment


    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.