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Checking in

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

When I talk about my lifestyle I can't say it stays the same constantly. The only constant is exercise. I never stop. I work out 6-7 days a week. I do it every day and like to push myself and make sure I get a very hard very intense work out in most days. I used to do strength every day, now I alternate sometimes. I was doing it every other day, and now I am doing it every other day using mostly P90X but also Jillian Michael's dvds as strength. My least favorite feeling is wandering the gym as my heart rate drops figuring out what to do next. It's why I love using a dvd for strength. Days I work I try to make my cardio only days to save time. But days like today, I did the legs and back P90X dvd and I am already sore! I feel accomplished when I know I worked hard in my strength routine. I feel like keeping myself strong physically keeps everything else strong for me.

Food wise, I have accepted that I am addicted to food and it is a constant battle. Being so active is probably the only reason I am not 200 pounds again. I don't eat fast food, fried foods, or lots of candy. But I have a tendency to need a "treat" or snack at night and soemtimes it triggers a binge. Tonight was a binge. And yeah it depresses me slightly because I worked out so hard this morning and now probably don't have a deficit. But it's how I am feeling at this point in my journey. I have some stress in my life and it helps to know that I am going to be okay, the weight isn't coming back on as long as I continue to work out the way I do. And I really do enjoy the workouts. I enjoy pushing myself. I usually do fantastic until dinner. And I know it changes. Some weeks I keep under 2,000 calories and am perfectly good and eat well. Then I have a week where I eat out every day and binge. I know my life is going to be an ongoing battle. It's just tough not having that control yet. I definitely have control outside of my home. It's when I am home that I get into trouble.

I have stopped weighing myself and it's making me nervous. I feel like I am losing inches as all my jeans are now loose. I just get nervous that I'll turn around and be 20 pounds heavier. But as long as I continue my strength training I know I am building muscle and losing inches.

Anyway I don't know why I felt like I needed to check in. Spark keeps me grounded. I've been reading blogs even if I don't comment I do read them. THis place is why I am where I am today. It's hard to not check on it every day.
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  • SILLYHP1953
    We all need to keep grounded and it sounds like you're doing a good job with it. Exercise does help keep you grounded...maybe save a little bit for the evening when you tend to binge? Or maybe try yoga, something more gentle on your body, when you get that feeling to overeat. Or MAYBE your body actually does need those calories because of all the exercise you're doing. Our bodies will tell us what they need if we can quiet our minds enough to listen. You have become much more reflective, it's easy to see the progress you're making when I've been reading your blogs for so long.
    2925 days ago
    Glad you checked in! It keeps us all connected. There is something about the support and encouragement we receive on Spark People. I sometimes spend more time here than on anything else on my computer. It's real and we all are here to support and encourage each other no matter where we are in our journey - and I think we all really can connect to that. So, glad you checked in and are continuing to make progress. :)
    2925 days ago
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