Gone was the feeling of guilt, Big victory
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Last night I had a night of boredom and restlessness. I started out by just eating a Lean Cusine for dinner. My hubby had went to a Mexican Fiesta fundraiser banquet where he helped serve the food. Maybe that was part of it. Could I have felt deprived not being able to join in on the fun and food. I tried to fix the eating by nibbling on popcorn. That didn't work, then I broiled some cheese on my diet bread and had a glass of milk. There was 2 hot links in the refrigerator calling my name but I knew they were bad for me. I had a Healthy whole wheat pumpkin muffin I had made earlier that day. Frustrated, I just kept thinking about those dumb hotdogs.
The moral of this story, I should of ate them first and been done with it because after hubby came home I did eat them and then I was OK.
The beauty of this story is for the first time in my whole life I didn't have that retching guilt feeling. I didn't detest myself for failing again. I didn't throw up my hands and say I give up
I can never do this. IN fact, I FELT CALM. I KNOW I can do this and one over indulged evening is not going to cause me to falter. I am at peace with myself and got up this morning and jumped right into Sparking. I feel like all is right and enjoyed my breakfast of cream of wheat and blueberries. My question to myself is what happened to me to change that guilt into self acceptance. I will be pondering on this. But I can tell you I have had a big breakthrough