Sunday, May 15, 2011

i AM STARTING TO FEEL MORE POSITIVE-I know that my obsession with weight and how |I look really means that there are parts of myself that I do not like at all. And there is no reason for it. I basically would not change who I am deep inside-I am just worried about the outside package I have come in !!
This obsession with weight has not helped me but I feel I had to go there before I could get here to this point. I have tried so hard to change things and have succeeded at many things in my life and now at this age and stage of my life I have accomplished goals I have set for myself-yesterday I took a picture of sunflowers against the background of a nature picture and it is beautiful -I am happy that I can compy the feeling and colours of my favorite artist Van Gogh-I will include it if I don't forget.

I am having to use a cane in the house and finally bought a raised toilet seat so I cAN GET UP OFF THE toilet-I feel slightly unhappy and a little bit shamed by it but that is life.
Waiting for knee surgery is hard and very painful. But I am adapting. When I spoke to the therapist in charge of thejoint replacement clinic he asked me how I could keep such a happy demeanor in spite of the health issues I have faced throughout my life-and I really really had to think about it and well you just keep on going adapting to changes, you laugh a lot and you have friends to cheer you on. So in fact I had an answer-

I am tracking my food most days and I watch what I eat but I have taken away the weigh scale so I am not obsessing over numbers that do not define me. I have been punished enough-so my scale will not track my weight.
I am swimming twice a week because my arthritis is so bad this year that I have had to cut back to this meager workout BUT I STILL DO IT-
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Isn't it frustrating how we spend so much energy THINKING about the weight?!? Getting from that point to just enjoying what we do sounds like an easy first step toward progress, and enjoying life has nothing to do with number-crunching!

    Getting that seat was a wonderful move! Have heard several people having to get them AFTER the knee surgery, so you're way ahead of them in pre-planning your recuperation. Keep being nice to yourself; you certainly do deserve to break free of anything stressing you.
    2532 days ago
    I LOVE the picture! Thanks for including it. Sorry you are still waiting for the knee replacement and are having difficulty getting around. It's a shame that you've even had to cut back on your swimming but good for you for still getting in the pool. Any word on when you might be able to get the surgery yet? I sure hope it is soon. Keep on Sparking and doing what you can. I've decided for myself at age 60 I will do what I can do and be grateful for what I've accomplished, just like what you said. We're doing emoticon

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    2533 days ago
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