I'm not trusting the system....HELP!

Saturday, May 14, 2011

I wish I could find out how many times someone on Spark has blogged aboutthis subject. And then I wish I had a dollar for every time...I probably would be sitting pretty right now.

I moved exercise to the back burner for the last 8 weeks. I think I had gym burn out and I also found other more "fun" things to do with my time. During this time, I tracked my food intake faithfully for 6 out of those 8 weeks. I was proud that I did not gain any weight during this time even though some days my eating (and mostly drinking alcohol) was out of control! I feel like I really was conscious of everything I put in my mouth and tried really hard to balance what I was eating.

So here I am again, back on track for the gym, and I am fighting the urge (not so successfully since I'm blogging about it) to throw this nutrition piece out the window again and just say "F--- it!". I always struggle with balance in my life because I'm so used to an "all or nothing" attitude towards the world. I KNOW this about me and I struggle EVERY DAY to beat it.

I know my feelings about nutrition and an active lifestyle go hand in hand and I feel like I did a year ago when I started my weight loss journey. I feel like I can't do this and it's too hard to *really* measure out EVERYTHING I put in my mouth. I feel like it's just not worth it to live such a structured life around EATING...

I am on a 6 week-whoevergetsclosesttolosin
g 15 pounds challenge. I picked a friend who I knew would keep me motivated and would make me want to work out. I KNEW it was going to cause me to stress out and I KNEW it was going to flood my brain with all kinds of anxiety and "stinkin' thinkin'" about myself and my motivation to really get this weight off faster. I KNOW it's a bad thing to weigh yourself every day and yet I f---ing do it with BAD results. I feel like I've been doing good for my body the past few days and the scale went UP! BY 2 POUNDS. In 3 DAYS. The scale didn't F-ing move for 8 weeks while I didn't exercise and ate what I wanted for the most part. So here I am doing what I'm supposed to be doing and the scale goes up!?!!!!

I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW that I should not let this stupid piece of equipment ruin my day and yet, I stepped on the F-ing thing AGAIN today! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?! I know this is not the measure of success and I KNOW that by Wednesday when I weigh in for my first official week of being back on track that it very well could say I've gained even though I know I didn't. I also know the sweet relief that will come if the scale says I have lost.

This mental hurdle has not kept me from working out and if anything it's going to motivate me to work even HARDER at the gym to lose weight.

I feel like the calorie ranges on Spark and the actual calories I burn are not enough. I feel like the amount of intake is wrong and I feel like I cannot trust the calories burned on the pre set activities on here. How can Spark tell me I've burned 501 calories in 30 minutes on the Elliptical Trainer when my machine tells me I've only burned 350. THATS A HUGE F-ING difference!!! I truly HATE the fact that you cannot figure out how many calories you burn when you are strength training...all it does is add to the number of minutes you put in for physical activity.

If losing weight really is a numbers game...why can't I find consistant information about how many calories I need to burn in order to lose weight consistantly? Why can't I find consistant information that tells me how many calories I need to eat daily in combination with the exercise I do to lose weight consistantly. I feel like I don't have the RIGHT information and I'm so frustrated!!

Prior to "restarting" this Spark thing, I maintained the same weight for 6 weeks even though I was eating within my calorie range and exercising the way Spark said I what is the problem?! Why did I maintain and not lose when I should have been because I was following the program. I know some of you will say "well did you really track accurately how much food you were really eating?!" and the answer is YES!

I'm so frustrated this morning and it's only 9:15. I feel like if I could just get some consistant information, I would feel so much better. I also feel like once I get over this mental hurdle I'm going to look back and laugh at how stupid I must sound.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I bought a scale at the Goodwill last week and have been weighing myself more than I have in the past. I'm not freaking out because it's just a new toy at this point and if I put it up I won't think about it as much. I've made up my mind that if it starts to take over than I would give it back to the Goodwill to sale. Have you thought about getting rid of the scale? I lost weight last year when I cut back on how much I weighed in. Stress causes the body so much stress. the stress may do more harm to the body than the weight now wouldn't that be a shame. I hope that things get better for you. I hope that you will find something that will help to give you another perspective. Take care of yourself.
    3250 days ago
    Well I can certainly say I've been right where you are ! I gained 6 pounds after Xmas and bounced around with a couple of pounds up and down but no significant loss. Like you I ate what I wanted and drank when I wanted but still kept a close eye on my intake and I maintained that weight for 4 months and not because I wanted to . .Then I went back to work ate a healthy breakfast daily packed my lunch of healthy food and got more exercise and WOW ! I lost three pounds in 2 weeks .
    I KNOW I need to exercise 45 mins daily to lose a pound a week on an 1800 cal diet .
    I KNOW that *SOMETIMES* a 12-1400 cal diet is too little food with my 45 minutes of exercise.
    I KNOW I CANNOT lose weight without exercise minutes at this stage of my life.
    I KNOW I have to live with structured eating for the rest of my life or I'll be right back where I started. Sad but True !!!
    I KNOW there are times when the scale WON'T budge for love nor money no matter how right you do things that week but wait until next week and it will show up then .
    I KNOW that weight loss cannot be nailed down to a numbers game . It just does not work like that ! Oh if it did this journey would be so much easier .

    These are just some things I have learned about me and my body .
    Each person is different and what works for one may may not work for all so consistant information still may not be helpful.
    All you can do is learn what works for YOU and only You .
    I KNOW you can do that !!
    3253 days ago
    Stress and that time of the month can make you gain 3-5lbs in a week emoticon Stick to a calorie intake of 1600 calories a day and get 30 mins of exercise a day. Cut out salt as much as you can. Hide your scale and ONLY take it out once a week to weigh in. This will eleviate some stress. Don't get discouraged. We have all gone through the same thing. Don't give up on yourself emoticon We believe in you.

    3253 days ago
  • SAMMY0328
    The best way to measure calories burned is with a heart rate monitor. You program it with your weight, height, gender and age so that it is able to give you a better calculation of what you burn while exercising. When I do the elliptical for the 30 minutes the machine will say I've burned 450 calories but my heart rate monitor says only 300. It really does make a HUGE difference!

    I highly recommend the Polar F6 which is what I have used for the last 3 years. It's simple to use and comes with many features but I mostly use it to measure my heart rate and calories burned. It costs around $100 but is well worth it in the long run. Just consider it as an investment in your health!
    3253 days ago
    Don't get frustrated! We have all been there, where you are doing everything right and scale doesn't budge or goes the wrong way! I know when I first started exercising my numbers went up also, but that was only for a few weeks and then the weight started coming off. I think the body goes into shock and wants to protect itself! After a few weeks, it starts to realize that this "torture" is going to be the new norm and starts accepting it! Good luck to you and be patient! I know that is hard, because I am struggling with it right now to try to get these last 10-20 off!
    3254 days ago
    Well my elliptical tells me I have burned 700 cals and spark tells me 350! LOL The #'s on the machine are just a general range..most of the time the cal. range is based on a mans body weight not a women. Also try using measurements to track your loss instead of the scale you will be able to SEE the change in your body. Weight loss is a journey it takes time...Some weeks you will loose lotts some you will gain. Is it muscles, water, or actual fat only time will tell. The trick is CONSISTENCY!!!! You can do this! Spark is a great place! Remember it took you a long time to gain weight it is gonna take just as long to loose it. I have been at 131 since Thanksgiving!!! I have upped my cardio and strength and I also upped my cals. Still NOTHING!!! Before Thanksgiving I weighed 128. I know 3 lbs may not be a lot but I see those 3 lbs in the way I look feel and fit in my clothes. This is a plateau and I WILL defeat it! Again it take consistency and patience. It is very difficult! But I know in the end worth it!!! You are not alone! We all struggle!!!
    3254 days ago
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