BABYCAKES1984

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What do I do???

Friday, May 13, 2011

As you all know, my mom is going through cancer treatment...Again! Well, my brother who has been struggling, is now living with her...he drives a truck which means he has been gone for about 3-4 wks. He has a 19 yr old son, who has NO job, No motivation, and NO initiative. He will not help with dishes WITHOUT being told or mow the yard without being told. AND then he does it when he is good and ready. OH and he says "he's not ready to get a job" REALLY??? He has time to be on Facebook and play video games. Sometimes at the same time. I love my brother and nephew, BUT, I am at my wits end. My mom calls me crying tonight...she is so upset about starting to struggle. My brother left and took his food card, so she can't go to the store. I am limited to the financial help I can give her. I will do what I can. But, I told her that I am going to confront my nephew and my brother about these arrangements. I want to be careful how I express it. BUT, I am upset and just downright mad. I don't want to make anyone mad, but at this point I feel like that is probably not a possibility. HELP!!!! THANKS!!!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • PATSY142
    Your brother should understand that your mom needs help. Tell him so. I know it will be hard, but it is for your mom's best interest and peace of mind.
    3618 days ago
  • EVER-HOPEFUL
    emoticon love.nothing for it but time for tough love.if your brother and nephew want to live with your mother they have to make their way,either with money or household help or both.be tough ,stand your ground,they will appreciate it in the long run and so will your mother.like an other reply said the easier solution might be for your mother to live by you but i have no idea how feasible that is.once again emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3620 days ago
  • DOTTIEJANE1
    Take a deep breath and do what ya gotta do.Let your brother and nephew know how mama is feeling.Then what is expected from each, also as time goes on expectations will change. When i had to do this is used a chore chart and a expectations chart prepared ahead of time .This was the prop for the talk .Expectation were manners and consideration along with respect. emoticon emoticon Dottie
    3622 days ago
  • LKWQUILTER
    Sometimes we have to do what has to be done. Talk to your brother and explain just how your mama is feeling about his son and about taking the food card. Is there a chance that she could move in with you? That would help the finances some by combining your assets. I am also a firm believer that when a child/grandchild resides with you, they work/go to school and do chores if they are adults--no free ride at grandma's (or mama's eithers). Mine grands will tell you this nana is strick unless you are really "sick." lol I will pray for all of you that things do work out. ((HUGS))
    3622 days ago
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