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Friday, May 13, 2011

This is just a middle of the night (or morning, depends on how you look at it) rush of nothing when sleep refuses to settle in, and my neck hurts, and my right hand, and right leg are numb, and restless, and my low back hurts when I lay down. I really tried to get to sleep in bed with cool sheets, and soft pillows, and quiet music, and it just wasn't working. Rather than disturb my hubby on his nights off to sleep in bed, and home from work - I tiptoed out, put on my neck brace and robe, and came to the computer to try to weary myself down.

I do not want to, like to, need to be a bummer, a downer, a complainer. Sometimes I just get so flustered, there isn't much to do.

So, I think about who needs prayer - my little grandson at the ER tonight - I do not know how he is, I did not hear back; a good friend's father who suffered a stroke; a spark friend facing total knee replacement in the next week; and a myriad of other people. I find it is a good thing to do when I can't sleep. At least it makes me feel like I am doing something useful when there isn't much I can do about things.

As soon as I lay down, I could tell my low back was very unhappy, and my shoulders, and neck chimed in, and my knee, and leg, and stuff sang in chorus.

I have not been tracking my food, other than yes I am eating 5 fruits and veggies, and drinking my water. I log my fitness after the fact, and am not where I was pre-surgery. Especially with the gain from the steroids.

I bought myself a pair of jeans anyway this week, even if it was not in a happy size, because I wanted to have a pair that was new and not just a pull on legging kind.

It looks like the rash is trying to decide to come back.

Positive things despite junk that just happens or that you deal with:
The sun is shining somewhere.
God cares and is in control. Even if things feel out of my control.
There is always a reason, even if I do not know what it is.
Pray, amazing things can happen.
I am sooo glad God created colors - it is an amazing miracle that rates right up there with new babies and kittens and flowers and water.

Happiness depends on happenings, Joy comes from someplace deep inside. So, despite the negative stuff that happens, I am joyful. Just read all of Philippians, or James.

May your morning, day, evening, week, and life be blessed.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I just figured out why - It was Friday the 13th!
    3069 days ago
    Sorry to hear about all of your problems. I (We)are here for you and understand and this is the place for you to vent. You are among friends here and I (We) don't mind hearing from you for whatever reason. Big Spark ((((((HUGS)))))) to you my friend and May God Bless. Have a Good Day.

    TONI emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3076 days ago
  • _LINDA
    So sorry you are having such a struggle, I hope you see some improvement soon, or get on those Doctors
    Knee replacement is one of the toughest surgeries to recover from. Your friend will have to work hard and suffer a lot to get back to normal. Wish her all the best!
    Hope you have some bright bits in Friday somewhere!
    3076 days ago
    I have to identify with SCOOTER4263 in that I "awfulize" things when I can't sleep. I keep meaning to put a Bible at the head of my bed for nights like that because I always say to myself that I don't want to get out of bed to go hunt up a Bible in the middle of the night.

    I hope you went back to sleep and got some rest!

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    3076 days ago
    Everyone needs to vent sometimes! emoticon . Now, pray for your friend and concentrate on all of your blessings! Your friends will be praying for "peace" for you! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3076 days ago
    Not reading you!!! Lol, of course I did! I agree with Beejay, you are doing more awesome than you think, your poor body has been thru the ringer! God doesn't give us more than we can bear! emoticon
    3076 days ago
  • SCOOTER4263
    I do the same thing when I can't sleep, because if I just lie there in the dark, I start to "awfulize" - imagine all the dreadful things that could happen (anywhere from the dog dying to the world blowing up, depending upon how long I've been there.) I think your idea of praying for others is an excellent one, not only doing good (I believe) but taking the focus off oneself and one's own problems.

    Interestingly, it never occurred to me to be grateful for colors. I always just assumed that colors were part of things, and I was grateful for having eyes to perceive them with!
    3076 days ago
  • BEEJAY49
    Okay, I didn't read it. LOL!

    Even if you don't think you are, you are doing great! Healing takes time and with time, other things tend to happen. You're right, everything does happen for a reason and I know that soon you will find out what it's all about. God gave the doctors the knowledge and skill to heal and they will do that for you whatever the pain, rash or healing process is. One day at a time! I know you've never heard that phrase before. Hehe! Hang in there, this too shall pass. Never feel guilty about complaining, we all need to vent now and then. Love you bunches! HUGS!
    3076 days ago
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