Thursday, April 28, 2011
I have developed interesting views about my appearance. I am someone who rather than think I am overweight...thinks they are just the right size...and have thought so for a long time. Even the other day I held up a skirt I washed and thought oh man that waist is kinda wide, surely it doesnt fit. Ha Ha it fit alright...like it was hand sewn to embrace my belly.
Interestingly my ideas about my body changed recently...by accident. I went to a dinner party at my friends house. He has a huge mirror -full length on one of his walls. Not an average mirror but one that covered the wall, sounds tacky but it was placed on a wall near the entry, as to obviously be a guide to see how you look before you leave for the day. My friends apartment is small, and the mirror reflects an edge of the bar facing the open kitchen, and the living room. When you sat on one of the bar stools you could see yourself sitting - sideways. You could see what you look like sitting down and your body from a SIDEWAYS view.
I was horrified and realized that I was fat! No pics needed here. But as I sat on one of the bar stools I saw a wide person in the mid section. The leggings I had paired with my skirt wasn't too chic as well. My petite legs looked fatter in shorter in something that I thought I was masking.
All these years of checking myself out in the mirror STRAIGHT ahead went out into space. I even have a full length mirror in my bedroom on my closet door, but I realized that since I stand really close to it to check myself out...my perspective was skewed. You need a big mirror, wide and tall to catch you from near and far, sitting, standing, frontways and more importantly SIDEWAYS.
How could I be so wrong, how could I think I looked in shape! I wanted to hide...here I was thinking yea you look good tonight, to oh my god who the heck is that in that mirror, and so thats how the body looks when it sits, rather than stands.
Although, I was miserable for the rest of the night and wanted to find a baggy t-shirt to cover my body...it made me realize...honey, You're 5'2, 155 pounds, I know you think that you're doing a good job covering it up, mixing and matching to create that silhouette you think is sexy - I know you think that you're skinny, and that it may look like it from the front...but don't forget to look SIDEWAYS and LONGWAYS.
And that...my friends is the main reason I'm thankfully here. I think its a pretty funny story and glad I could share it.