Making my goals

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Good afternoon sparkbuddies! Hope you are doing well.

It is not secret to those who know me, I have been struggling. I have been working out and eating within my calorie limits for the most part, no perfectly but consistently. I haven't lost a pound in a month. I fixated on the scale, then ignored the scale, then fixated on it again emoticon I want to see progress and I want to see it on the scale! No one had noticed that I had lost weight and that of course has made me feel even more discouraged. I entertained the give up option and would dismiss it quickly. Failing would be giving up.

Today, I shared with a friend of mine about how frustrated I am with my lack of movement with the scale and how hard I was working out. I shared about how I didn't make my mini weight loss goal for April and how disappointed I was that I couldn't make that little goal. Her response was "maybe you just can't lose the weight, maybe you have lost all you can" I looked at her face and she was not kidding. She then talked about how I have been heavy for so long and yo yo-ing up and down for so long, I may have damaged my metabolism. She said your age is a factor, you are not 20 anymore either. I don't know if that stuff is even true but the fact that she said I probably can't do it really hurt my feelings

I told her that I believed I could do it, that I had to stick it out and just trudge through this rough time and what she said hurt my feelings. I wanted encouragement from her. She then said "Well you can't convince me that you can lose that much weight but it seems like you have convinced yourself you can do it" She said she didn't want me to get my hopes up and then be devastated when I couldn't do it, that she has seen me hurt so much over so many things, she couldn't raise my hopes in this situation.

This conversation really hit me when I got home today. She said that I had convinced myself that I could do it. The thing is, until that moment, I had been hoping others could convince me that it was going to happen when in fact I need to be actively believing I can make my goals and I can do this. What a simple thing to do but it is so hard for me. I have never had success in this area of my life but it doesn't mean I won't have success now.

I thought I need to focus on the good things I am doing and put less emphasis on the scale. So I came home and took my measurements. I was stunned.
I have lost 8 inches in my waist alone since I began this amazing journey in January.
That is progress and it is tangible!
I don't have all this figured out but I do know, I have to keep plugging away at it and I need to be good to myself, be nice to myself. I wouldn't treat a friend badly, I shouldn't do that to me either.

Thank you for listening, I know that I am so slow to learn things and even then, I don't learn them and need you to tell me all over again. Thank you for your patience with me.

I am thankful for you and your support!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    8 inches to me is worth more than the scale moving anyday. And you can totally do this! Add in ST and you will up your metabolism and see results like you are with losing inches!
    2581 days ago
    you've had an "ah-ha" moment, haven't you!

    Here's an idea -- let's lose this darn weight for once and for all!
    2583 days ago
    My dear friend I have been having the same experience as you. I have lost nothing for the last couple of months. I have been backward and forward with the same two lbs. I had a scale fixation also and I had to remove myself from it.
    I am currently back to weighing myself once a week and have noticed a 1lb loss last Friday. I too am in my 50's (I didn't look at your age) so I know the frustration.
    Recently my daughter bought me a digital scale and I'm getting more precise reading of my food portions I am also sticking to my exercise routine and have added weight training.
    Let no one tell you it can't be done. I believe that I can do it and I am pressing on I am not looking to anyone for motivation and affirmation, but I do have to thank my husband and daughters in this regard.
    So you press on with what you are doing and the results will come forth. Read all the motivating blogs that you can and watch that weight come right off of you. emoticon All the best to you.
    2583 days ago
    Progress! I'm so glad you are seeing a change. It is often hard for others to see the change also. You can continue this journey. Find your Resting Metabolic Rate and use that for your calorie limit (something new that may help.) Stay within 200 calories of that. It will be a bit more than you might be used to, but it will help you because you won't be starving.

    Did you know stress slows weight loss, so if we stress about it, we are slowing things down. You can do this.
    2586 days ago
    I am very proud of you that you let her know how her words affected you. I am so glad you processed what happened and realized that in the end all that matters is what you believe. I believe in you; I'm sorry your friend does not. Keep pressing on. You've made awesome tangible progress. You will continue to do so. What happened made me think of this quote:
    "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Elenor Roosevelt. You are telling yourself the truth and treating yourself like a friend. That is amazing progress, maybe even more important than weight loss.
    2587 days ago
    8 inches off your waist!!!! Wow! That is a wonderful non-scale victory!!! Hooray!!!
    As far as the scale, don't give it so much power over you! It's not the only way we can measure progress. As a matter of fact, if you're losing inches, are your clothes getting looser? It sounds like your body right now may be exchanging toned muscles for flab ... and we know that muscles weigh more. But they also keep your metabolism burning hotter.
    Trust yourself. Trust that if you continue to do the right things, you will see the results. You're doing things now that you couldn't do 3 months ago. That's more progress!
    I'd say you are making good progress!!
    2587 days ago
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