Just a Quick Update of Bad News, Then Sleep
Thursday, April 21, 2011
It's been a bad week. A really, really, REALLY bad week. And I'm in desperate need of support. We found out yesterday that my husband has/had colon cancer. They removed a polyp that turned out to be cancerous. Today, he was bleeding again (2nd time since the surgery almost 2 weeks ago) and they went back in. They're concerned. They've kept him in the hospital and there's talk of an arteriogram and possibly surgery. There is a possibility of another tumor. We don't know at the moment.
I'm tired right now. I'm worried and I'm scared. Normally, this would have me reaching for the chocolate, but I'm actually running the other way with it - I don't want to eat at all. I know it's not good for me and it's not helping matters any, but food is one of the last things on my mind.
So... I need support. Emotional support primarily. I need good thoughts and good wishes sent our way. I need to be reminded that not knowing doesn't necessarily mean bad news. I need virtual hugs, because I can't get a lot of the physical kind at the moment.
I'm going to be bringing the kids back to the hospital tomorrow. I don't know if he's going to be kept longer or if they're going to release him. I need to be with him. Part of me wishes that the kids had PDO tomorrow so I could be there without having to break up fights between them. But I know seeing them helps as much as seeing me does. Even when they fight.
I think I need sleep. I've been running on fumes most of today and it's only now that I'm start to feel tired. Hopefully, I'll sleep hard. And hopefully, my kids will let me sleep until I wake up on my own.