bad news

today wasn;t a good day. went to doctor for a follow up. and i recieved bad news. i was told if i didn;t have back surgry i could in up in a wheel chair the rest of my life. than in the same breath she told me. if i do the surgry i;ll end up in a wheel chair. and she won;t take the chance on the surgry. because its to close to my spine.
so on the way home . i did a lot of crying .so no matter what i do its the same results.i really had high hopes on this and got shot down.
last week end i saw my new granddaughter for the first me. she weighs 16lbs. when i tryed to pick her up . i all most fell wi her. i couldn; even hold my 5 month old granddaughter.so again i cryed on the way home .
tim told me we;ll just take everyday as it comes. i jus didn; want to be in a wheel chair for the rest of my life. because my mom was when my children were little.and i didn;t want the same faith for my grand children.
i guess with a prayer and my family we;ll get thru his he best we can.but a still can;t sop the tears .so i;m going to take my klotipan. and hope tomorrow is a better day

thanks for letting me get this off my chest