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Day 03 �� Something you have to forgive yourself for.

Monday, April 04, 2011

I am having some real issues figuring this one out. So here goes some writing and I have no idea what will come out, or if it will be posted.

Something I have to forgive myself for.... well, I try not to hold onto things that I have done wrong in the past, as it isn't very helpful. It tends to trap me into redoing those things and not breaking out of the pattern.

As I said earlier my mouth and my head are too closely connected. Whatever I think, I tend to say. This leads to me expressing my anger and my frustration more often then I would like. But it is hard to figure out when I need to express my anger or frustration and when it will do more harm to those around me, then it will do good for me to express it. IE my mom tended to be a hold it all inside until she blew person and that meant us kids had no idea why she blew. It made us more careful around her, more nervous. My son used to respond to me that way, but then I found ways to enforce the rules earlier so I didn't do such a thing. But there are still times, at work and with others that I don't feel like I can enforce rules early, and I get frustrated and somewhat angry. Then I have a tendency to choose a whining partner and somewhat whine. IE I obsess until I decide if I am going to do anything about it or not.

Now, do I need to forgive myself for my whining, sharing of my frustration and anger? Not sure. I do need to stop doing it so much. If the person being whined about hears about it, it could hurt them and I don't want that to happen. I also don't want others to treat the person I am whining about different either, as it is just whining, not serious complaints. I have always tried to warn my whining partners of that fact. Of course, then it almost becomes an excuse. If they let me whine and then ignore it as I ask, I feel like what is the harm in it? Why not do it, if it allows me to get it off my chest?
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  • RR1_RR1
    Everyone needs to whine sometimes. I also have a whine partner but I know they get sick of hearing it from
    2787 days ago
    Okay, well I was on your site thanking you for taking time to respond to my blog, so guess it's my turn here. When I had a job (LOL) I was the person everyone came to when they wanted to vent about other. I think they just considered me a safe person they could trust to keep it to myself. Plus, they wanted the sympathy of myself and others.

    First, know that even with the safest people, sometimes leaks can occur--even accidentally in casual conversation. So, if you want to make sure the person you are speaking about doesn't hear what you have to say, the only truly safe way to vent is to yourself in private or maybe a friendly chat with your family pet.

    We all get frustrated. We all vent and say things we shouldn't. We've heard we are to, "Do unto others as we would have them do unto us," but we don't tend to live that way.

    Imagine you are the subject of someone else's "venting." If you don't want to be talked about in the same way, then you need to try healthier ways to get rid of your frustrations. Looks like you have been VERY successful with your weight and exercise goals--Congrats! How about keeping up that positive momentum the next time you get angry by taking a quick jog or walk around the office building. It's not as much fun as trashing others, but it's healthier, safer and you can feel good about yourself for doing the right thing.

    2811 days ago
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