pondering onederland....

Monday, February 14, 2011

so if i do good this week....i could be in onederland next week! i cant believe. i havent been under 200 pounds in YEARS...like sophomore year of high school. im trying to make sense of it all. in some ways i feel so much better. its a little easier to find clothes that fit me now and i usually like the way they fit me...but in a lot of ways i still feel almost 240 pounds, huge, and miserable. sometimes i look in the mirror and cant see any weight loss anywhere. i feel huge. im still so much bigger than a "normal" person. i still dont feel cute when i go out and i still sometimes wonder if i will ever be attractive enough to meet someone. BUT its still awesome to have lost this weight, im still proud of myself. and i think alot of my anxiety right now is that im not sure if i can get to under 200. i feel like ill always be 200+, fat, and depressed. but im THISCLOSE! and i just need to stick to some positive thinking and eating right and getting in some exercise when i can. I CAN DO THIS!! 199 HERE I COME!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    You're so close! You can do this. I can't wait until I'm in onederland too! It will take a while for me, so I need you to keep up the good work - I need all the inspiration I can get! You're worth it and when you're ready I'm sure you'll find someone that is crazy about you. GO GO GO
    3575 days ago
    thanks for the encouraging words! its helpful to know that i am not in this alone : ) emoticon emoticon
    3580 days ago
    I am in the exact same boat! I am 2.8 pounds away from ONEDERLAND and also started around a little less than 240! I still don't feel like I have lost the weight most days, but others comment on it constantly. I think it's a mindset that I am going to have to learn. I might keep losing weight and get "skinny" but in my head, I will always be the fat girl. Good luck!! I am sure Onderland will be all we imagined! emoticon
    3580 days ago
    you can do this!!!!! We all have to re assess our ways of thinking. You have probably had low self esteem through your life with the gain of weight. You need to think positively and lovingly towards yourself. I will get under 200 lbs. I am beautiful. I am healthy. I am doing this for me. I am positive. I am loving. I will find a good person to be mine. Just remember those and tell yourself over and over again. Eventually it will be second nature. I know i have been using mantra's like that and i feel better all the way around.

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    3580 days ago
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