well its friday and what a week :-o
Friday, February 11, 2011
ugh--this is one of those weeks that just had to be endured. fortunately there have been bright spots punctuating everything, but i could do with some plain, simple routine time right now. first of all soda--when we weaned her steroids off she couldn't handle it. talked to the vet who suggested a myelogram. she had cervical spine surgery 4 years ago and we can't put her through all that again. not only is expense prohibitive (we were very lucky we had the money the first time) but its too traumatic for a 12 year old dog as shy as she is to travel to purdue, be checked over and handled by a bunch of students, and then deal with the risks of anaesthesia (she is very sensitive) and all the other risks. so we made the decision to simply stay on the prednisone as long as we can and give her the best pain free and happy life for whatever time we get. so spent the day crying and talking on the phone to various people, crying in the car on the way to the store etc. the only bright light is that when i know i am right i KNOW it--and this is RIGHT. rob agrees as well. its very hard to stop trying to make this better--but surgery is the only thing that will really fix it and you have to come to a point where you know enough is enough--and we are there now.
so that was all a big bunch of trauma--then last night we had the dogs out for potty and some drunk slid off the road and into our yard on the far side of the driveway. buried her car about halfway deep in the snow. a VERY responsible 19 year old young man (who she had recently almost sideswiped while passing at 70 mph) saw her go off and stopped in the driveway and called the cops. she of course was begging him not to. i guess she wanted to head off down the road and see if she could actually kill someone instead of just coming close. she barely missed the telephone pole and the steep ditch--either of which could have easily given her a nice big closed head injury. add this to the episode of last weekend where the poor 48 year old lady across the street died from her career of alcohol abuse--and i am kind of DONE with drunks right now. it was very nice meeting the young man who stopped--we had him come in the house while he waited to give his statement to the police--he was very responsible for stopping, and concerned about the lady's safety as well as his own--and everyone else that might have been in her path. he was coming home from class at the local IU campus, and called his parents a couple times while he was here t let them know he was going to be late getting home.
a different situation would have been nice, tho.
i woke up at 1 am and haven't really been asleep since. and i hadn't fallen asleep until midnight. soda has to get her last medication of the night at that time so it has messed our sleep schedule up a lot.
well--since i was in need of some good news this morning--i was THRILLED that my weight has gone down 1.8 pounds. again--that is a fabulous amount for a one week loss for me--and that brings my total so far to six pounds. i have managed to stay within my guidelines for the entire week--even amazed myself yesterday when at the store. i had determined on the way there that if i needed to do some emotional eating i was going to allow myself to do it--i just was going to purchase something carefully and eat it mindfully. know what i finally chose? a diet pepsi. no kidding. one of my spark streaks is devoted to minimizing my intake of artificial sweeteners. the good part of doing this that i hadn't anticipated is that it has moved something with few or no calories into "forbidden" territory. so if i want to splurge--mentally i am doing it but i am choosing a low calorie splurge. i didn't drink very much of it, so i stuck it in the frig in case i feel like having some today.
guess thats all--i am so SO tired.