TREP13
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Sibling rivalry

Wednesday, February 09, 2011

So, my sister is in town and it's been so great to visit with her without her kids around (I love them dearly but we get to have "adult" time without them) or anyone else in the family. It's nice to just hang out and have girl talk. We're having a slumber party in her hotel tonight which should be fun too. The only downside is that I am literally faced with how tiny and beautiful my sister is. She's a size 6, 6'0" tall and just gorgeous overall. I feel like a cow standing next to her. I know it's bad to compare myself to other people but we have the same genes so it's hard NOT to do that. My brother and sister have always been thin and athletic and I have not. I know I need to just focus on me and my achievements and not get hung up on comparisons but it's challenging.
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  • TREP13
    Well, it didn't go *that* well. She wasn't feeling well last night and cancelled our sleepover which made me sad. I thought she was mad at me but she insists she's not. I had fun hanging out with her and a few of her friends (and one of my friends) though. It was good to have my sis in town. :)
    2836 days ago
  • EBEAMS
    So ... don't leave us in suspense ... how did it go?
    2836 days ago
  • SBEHNKE2
    I totally understand. My sister and I have both struggled with weight, but she seems to keep it in check better than I do. She is always supportive and we have even agreed to workout together, but it is still hard to not compare myself to her.

    I do imagine that your sister (and brother for that matter) is proud of you for taking steps to a healthier lifestyle and they would not want you to feel self-conscious around them (my sister would not want me to feel bad).

    Remember that you are taking positive steps to a healthier life. You may never look as slim as your sister or brother, but you are making yourself healthy for you. Rejoice in the accomplishments you have made and keep your eye on the prize - emoticon
    2837 days ago
  • TREP13
    Awwww....you're so right. I know my sister is proud of me and loves me for who I am. And I know she struggles with her own issues. She hates how tall she is and she never thinks that she's thin enough. I know she isn't judging me for my size. I'm the one doing that. It's something I'm working on. Thanks for your kind words. They made me get a little teary-eyed.
    emoticon
    2837 days ago
  • EBEAMS
    "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt said this a long time ago and it still rings true today. My sister was the tall, thin, pretty one the whole time we were growing up. She is still older and taller than me, which I make sure I point out on a regular basis ... LOL ... By the time I reached 7th or 8th grade, I was wearing a size 12 pants and was totally embarrassed at how big I was.

    Thing is we focus on ourselves and forget to search inside the other person to see what they struggle with in their own mind and body. Your sister has an internal voice that shouts to her when she looks in a mirror or goes into a room full of strangers. Often we take for granted that someone who is pretty or petite or thin has no issues at all and we are judging ourelves by what we THINK they are thinking.

    If your sister is like mine, she loves you dearly for who you are on the inside and on the outside. She appreciates the fact that you are wonderful person, that you have a great heart. I'm sure she doesn't view you as a "cow" when you are standing next to her but as a pillar of support, a ray of sunshine and a dear friend.

    So ... what I'm saying is change your filtering device! Don't give your inner voice the power to make you feel like you are not succeeding in your journey, that you are unworthy! Revel in the fact you have the opportunity to have a grown up sleep over with someone who loves you exactly as you are today and will be there for you no matter what comes. In the end, the only one judging you ... IS YOU!
    2837 days ago
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