Tuesday, February 08, 2011
This will probably be a rambling entry, as there are a million thoughts swirling around in my head...
I was just looking at my blogs from this time last year when I was on Medical Weight Loss. I was doing so well. I was down to 170, which is lower than my current goal! Clearly, I fell off the wagon big time, as I am back up to approximately 195. I am so mad that I let myself do that. I spent $400 to lose about 17 pounds and then gain it back and more??? What am I doing to myself???
In the past few months, as I've been finishing my couseling degree, I've tried to take a closer look at myself. I spend so much time listening to others and encouraging them to face the things that they don't want to, but I guess it's time for me to step up and do the same. I've realized I am a binge eater. I'm still not sure why, but I do, and I have to work on that. I'm trying to be aware of everything that I put in my mouth, and absolutely trying to recognize when I am actually hungry.
I tried on dresses for my sister's wedding a few months back and was mortified when I couldn't fit into any of the samples. There were 10 other girls there and they were waiting for me to come out and model the dresses like they had and I couldn't. Now I have 3 months to at least look halfway decent (but more importantly FEEL halfway decent). And so the journey begins again.