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New Year, New Me~Day 27

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Yesterday was Emma's birthday and snow came especially for it! The snow was heavy as we had Thundersnow and then we lost power around 8pm until some time after 1 in the morning. This morning I woke up around 430 and as I knew I had to go to work. Nature called and after I was done there, I washed my hands and happened to look in the mirror. This is what I saw:

Kinda freaked me out. I asked DH, "did you do that?" Joking of course. One of my nurse friends on FB said it looked like a broken capillary. It doesn't hurt much at least. One of my other friends said it looked freakish. Guess I be a freak, eh?

I ended up not going to work today as we had no power. I also didn't go to my doctor's appt as it was near work (work is about 45 minutes from here and doctor's office is nearby). I was lucky enough to be able to talk with my doctor on the phone though. She is so emoticon! We talked for about 10 minutes and once she was sure I was ok mentally, she allowed me to reschedule my appointment for next Friday. My self esteem is sucking right now and I'm a bit low. But I'm doing my best not to let it get me too down. We are celebrating Em's birthday this Saturday at Chuck E Cheese (please pray for me emoticon) as I was having issues getting the Tea Party location secured. I start feeling upset and down when I try and figure out what the heck I might wear to her party that will fit and won't have me feeling like a cow. emoticon

I will confess that yesterday after shopping for Em at Walmart, I sat in my car for quite a bit stuffing my face with Doritos and Nutter Butter cookies(I even remember reading others blogging about doing this but I honestly hadn't done this in a very long time). My eating is out of control and I did tell my doctor about it this morning along with my concerns about my depression. I hate feeling like this.

I'm sorry I am not able to be more upbeat in this blog. I know that I am blessed to be alive and to have a beautiful little girl whom I love dearly. I am just having a time of it right now. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a brighter day. I know that God loves me and He has a plan for me...

One day at a time... emoticon prayer will get me through!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LESLIES537
    I'm glad you were able to atleast talk to the doc. Keep that chin up and most importantly, HAVE FUN at Em's party!! Em doesn't care how her momma will look, she just wants her momma happy! Enjoy your special day together! emoticon emoticon emoticon

    I'm so sorry you are struggling! emoticon
    2645 days ago

    Comment edited on: 1/28/2011 11:12:33 AM
  • NEWNAC304
    Sorry that you're struggling right now. Be good to yourself and take whatever time you need to focus on you. You are worth it. emoticon
    2645 days ago
    You're right, one day at a time. Sorry you are feeling kinda blah, I'm in the same boat. Hopefully, springtime is around the corner and will brighten our days! emoticon
    2645 days ago
    S, I'm sorry you're feeling so crappy, but you know that as with all things, this too shall pass. Do your best to work through it and take one day (or one hour) at a time. Remind yourself that you are a strong woman who has a lot of living left to do!
    I'm thinking of you, friend....

    2645 days ago
    I hope tomorrow is better for you! I had a rough day myself, still sick, but power back on as of 2 hours ago finally!

    Hug Em for me and tell her I said Happy Birthday please!!
    2645 days ago
    One day at a time my friend... it's all that you really have. Just do your best. Love, Dawn emoticon
    2646 days ago
    We all have these days. This is when we need our Sparkfriends the most, so don't be sorry for not being upbeat. Just take it day by day. I hope things look up for you very soon. emoticon
    2646 days ago
    I understand. Food/emotions/stress/feeling not enough...I totally get it. Wish I knew the end-all be-all fix, but the truth is I'm struggling too. You are not alone. What I do hope is that talking to each other and encouraging each other will help us. Ok, I haven't done my ten minutes of exercise yet today. I'm going to do it right now, for me and for you. We can pull out of this. We are worth it! Sending you big hugs Simone!
    2646 days ago
    I'm sorry you're feeling so down. I wish you the best. You're gonna get through it, one day at a time, remember? emoticon
    2646 days ago
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