I Can Do This
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
After my post about excuses yesterday, I decided that I don't want to make excuses any more. And it was time for me to jump back into the things that I need to do.
The boys told me yesterday that they wanted to workout with me. I found a pilates video with three different levels (Pick Your Level: Weight Loss Pilates with Ellen Barrett, for those curious) and decided to start there. Working out with the boys... not such a good plan. Teddy kept bumping into me and Pete thought that me on the floor for mat work was an invitation for him to climb on me. But I did get a good workout anyway. I felt really good afterwards, feeling like I could continue to work out forever. I did my strength exercises as well. So I felt pretty accomplished.
This morning, my arms and shoulders ached, but I knew it was a good ache and the only way to get through it would be to continue with my workouts. Rich stayed home today to keep an eye on the kids for me because I had a couple of appointments that I really couldn't bring the boys to. This morning was my girly doctor, which was as great as always. I love my girly doctor. He delivered both my boys and he's just a nice, funny man. He had a med student with him today and she was great too. I found out that her academic advisor is my PCP (another doctor that I love), so it was an interesting bit of coincidence. The best thing about my appointment this morning is that I don't need to go back for a year. All was A-Ok.
After my appointment, I picked up Rich and the boys so we could stop by Target to pick up some things for one of my swaps. I also was planning on picking up a swiss ball and a pedometer. I've noticed that a lot of the exercises for my strength training require a swiss ball. And if I'm going to be serious about getting in shape, I need the equipment to do so. I got my swiss ball, but decided against the pedometer because they were pricier than I could afford today. (And it was a good thing, because the pedometer that I thought was broken wasn't, so I don't need a new one.)
I was pretty good at lunch, too. We went to Shoney's and I got myself a small amount of main dishes (mac & cheese, creamed corn and a small piece of meatloaf). Rather than going back for seconds, I had a small salad. (I would have considered going for nothing but salad but I REALLY hate iceburg lettuce and that's all they have.) For dessert, rather than going for a big plate of pudding, I had a couple of pear halves. The best lunch possible? No. But better than it could have been.
I did pilates again this afternoon after we got home. It was tough.... REALLY tough. My muscles were definitely still aching from yesterday and it wasn't as easy for me to do it. But I pushed through because I knew I needed to. I wasn't able to do my strength exercises because I had my first therapy appointment, but I made sure to do them when I got home. My boys are loving the swiss ball, though. Teddy's found a new chair.
My therapy this afternoon went really well, too. I was nervous about it - I always am. But my therapist is a wonderful woman and she gave me some great ideas to help me with my anger and depression. I see her again in 2 weeks, this time for a 50 minute session. Hopefully, that will help some too. Tomorrow I go see the doctor for a psych eval and to get my meds adjusted.
I'm feeling GOOD tonight. Better than I have in a long time, both physically and mentally. My kids aren't being angels but I'm not getting upset with them. I'm even having some fun with them as we watch Whose Line Is It Anyway?
I need to remember this. It's so important for me to remember this. Because if I don't, I'll be setting myself up to fail again. I need to remember that even when it's hard, I feel good after exercising. I feel good after talking to people and getting out for a little bit. I CAN do this.