Two Injections Down, One to Go...
Monday, January 17, 2011
As I shared in my previous blog entry, my doctor has prescribed 3 eye injections per month to treat early onset macular degeneration. Of course I freaked out at first, who wouldn't? He said my response was normal so I didn't feel too bad. I went through the first injection with nerve wracking trepidation, but my young indian doctor was so encouraging, gentle, kind, patient and told me each step of the way what he was doing and what to expect. I came through it thinking, "well, that wasn't as bad as I thought it would be". So the next month when I went in for the second injection I wasn't as nervous. I knew what to expect and thought it would be a piece of cake. NOT! My wonderful doctor greeted me and the assistant started to set me up for the procedure. I layed back on the table and she prepped my eyes. Then WOOSH! out of no where this older doctor sits down in the chair behind me! I looked at my young doctor and said, "aren't you doing the procedure?!? He looked apologetic and started to speak when the older doctor spoke over him saying, "I'm doing the procedure. I am his boss. I can do it better than him." I was struck by his pompous pride and lack of diplomacy, simply put, RUDE! I spoke up on behalf of my doctor and said, "I think Dr. _______ does a wonderful job. He made me feel very comfortable during the last procedure." The older Dr. just ignored me and began the procedure, he did not talk me through it and he was NOT as good as my young doctor. He did not talk me through it, just jumped right into the procedure. It hurt and his attitude in disregarding me as a patient completely stunned, aggravated me, and bowled me over. I was taken completely by surprise when he suddenly turned up without warning! My young Dr. moved around to the side of the table to hold my hand through it. He told me afterwards that he was also taken by surprise as this older doctor never shows up to take over like that! But he was his boss so he could not say anything about it. I could've said something, but was in such a state of shock and vulnerability preparing to have the procedure that I was just stunned! Afterwards, I chastised myself for not taking a stand and I was so ANGERED!!! I felt violated. My young doctor took me aside to afterwards to a private room to apologize and explain he couldn't say anything about it, but that the next time I come in to specifically request him to do the procedure. That would prevent it from happening again. Now I am left with pondering why the heck this kind of thing happens when you're least expecting it. I hate when that happens! It's bizarre when this stuff just happens out of the blue! We all know life here on this earth isn't easy and life goes on. I am choosing to stay positive and slough off the dregs of this unpleasant experience. The good news is that my eyesight may be benefitting and being older I have become more resilient to insults.
Also, dealing with medical problems while trying to lose weight is a challenge. I have come to face the fact that I have used food to comfort and soothe myself. At least I am aware of that now and can find other ways to compensate. I am finding other ways such as putting a log on the fire, putting on cozy socks and comfy clothing, reading a good book or exploring artistic venues.
I also want to express my sincere gratitude to all my Spark Friends who have prayed for me in this situation. I have felt your prayers and the peace of God that surpasses understandin