TKAYSMILES
50,000-59,999 SparkPoints 55,219
SparkPoints
 

Feeling good today!

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Well this week seems so much different then last week that is for sure. I was so stressed out last week. We had a set back with my son and it just threw me for a loop. I found out he didn't go to class much last semester and failed everything. I kind of had a feeling over Christmas that it wasn't good, but I ignored my instincts and didn't even ask him. I didn't want to hear bad news during the few days he was home. I just didn't realize how bad the depression had hit him. As a sufferer of depression myself I should have seen the signs, but he was really good at lying and not letting me know how bad it was. He has gone to a counselor and today should be calling for a psych dr. appointment. I hate that he will have to be on meds, but at this point he needs to feel good again too. I hate that he is struggling with this. I was really trying to let him stand on his own feet and not talk to him everyday. Well he didn't handle it very well so it is back to micro managing him for a bit. I just didn't want the one thing I pass on to him be depression. That just makes me sad too! I appreciate all who read this and listen. I realize it does effect my health and well being as well as his.

Last week during all of this, I didn't eat well. Not horrible or anything, just not enough. But I am back to logging all my food and my fitness in. That has helped me stay on track this week. So far so good. It's amazing though even with all the crud last week with my son, I still feel so good. I had my moments, but I'm not dwelling on the negative and causing myself panic attacks in the process. That doesn't help anyone me included. It just amazes me how eating right and exercising can help with so many aspects of our lives. Had this happened last year I might be in bed myself.

I have 15 weeks to go before my walk. I have to do 8 and 5 miles this weekend. I am going to sign up for a 10K for Saturday. That will get 6 miles in then I'll add a few more either later that day or Sunday. I am feeling so good about this walk. I feel strong and capable. So excited! I am experimenting with shoes to find a pair that really feel comfy and don't cause me blisters or toe nail loss. Right now I am leaning toward Asics. I tried a pair of Nike+ shoes and they just don't seem to have enough support in them for me. But I got some insoles for them and am going to try them again.

Ok, I am rambling alot here today. Just wanted to get a blog out since it had been awhile!!!

BLC 15 started last week and that has been awesome! I love my new team! I did pretty well with the weekend challenge! I would give myself a B for the weekend. There was some stuff I could have done better but overall I think I did pretty well.

I did have one thing to ask all my friends. Last week my BF said he needed to join Sparkpeople to start logging in what he eats. He doesn't need to lose weight but he has to keep up with his fiber and he wants to make sure he is eating enough for all the exercising he is doing. Well I did not have a positive reaction to this at all. My first reaction was NO...this is my one spot where you aren't. He is on facebook so I am always having to be careful there, and Spark is mine. How selfish is that though!! I thought about it for a minute and took it back, it is selfish and unspark like of me to not want him here. How would you all feel?? I honestly don't think he would be active here at all, in fact I would probably be the one putting in all his food and everything. Just wondering how you all would feel about this???

Thank you all for being here and for your support! It means the world to me! Tomorrow is the first weigh in for BLC 15. I'm hoping for a small loss at least!! You all have an awesome day! Stay warm!!!
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • SEYSARAH
    I totally understand wanting to keep Spark all to yourself however I do think he could have his own username and you keep yours..more than likely he or you would be tracking what they eat but probably not using other resource tools unless the mood strikes...

    I have several family members not losing but tracking...I know who they are of course but they come on mostly to track...teenagers are over at SparkTeen, one is over at BabyFit and I don't go either place..it's their thing..and some maintain profile pages and that's it..basically we do our own thing and let it go..that way amongst all these people they can join or not join whatever teams and because Spark is so individual..we can do our own version of Sparking without "bumping" into each other...it works well.

    When I do spread the spark..I talk to people with my real name..they have no clue as to what my username is and I do suggest teams that would benefit them..check to make sure they are active and email them...you can all Spark in the same family but everyone is different and thus it tends to do better if each has their own username and their own teams specific to their needs and that way if they fall off or something happens it won't affect you...

    Huge site..enough room for all..but we all deserve our own little niche so to speak..you can form a private family team and from there go your separate ways...many do and it works great.


    2739 days ago
  • TEENY_BIKINI
    emoticon
    2739 days ago
  • no profile photo TRABOLD8567
    I'm happy that you are feeling good despite all of the stuff going on. Sounds like having a plan in place for your son helps you a lot.

    I totally understand about your BF. Only you know what you can handle. If you're ultimately going to be the one logging, sending him to a different site will only mean more work (and computer time) for you.

    Maybe it will be temporary and you can speak freely again. Or put your deepest darkest thoughts in your private SP journal (on the appointment page).

    Good luck with your decision!

    Julie
    2740 days ago
  • DETERMINDCHICKY
    First off, I am sorry about your son. Maybe just maybe he could go for the Avon walk with you. Maybe you could show him that living a healthy lifestyle helps battle the depression. Its a thought. I know how much this must be bothering you. :(

    As for BF,I know just how you feel. My suggestion would be to make your sparkpage accessible by friends only. That way, he can come and use the site but he can't eavesdrop on you lol.

    emoticon
    2742 days ago
  • TKYETTER2
    I am glad you are having a better week. :) I hope and pray for continued healing for your son. As for the BF, if you don't want him in your space, would it be inappropriate for him to not be in the same groups as you? I am sure if he knew it was important to you that he would respect it. But at the same time, I totally can see the nutrition tracker being helpful to him. That is the main reason I joined spark. Finding support and friends has been an added blessing. And who knows maybe he will find the same thing, and it will give you guys something to talk about. ??? All in all it is up to you and I am sure you will make a good decision =)
    2743 days ago
  • SHAKTI_ANGELIKA
    Hmmm, well, in my case it would be hard to imagine my partner wanting to do this, because he's the biggest (and I mean biggest) non-computer person there is. Even sending an email is a big deal for him; he just can't seem to get it. It's annoying because he's super smart in other ways. Okay, now I'M rambling...LOL.

    I am guessing (?) he's either jealous of the time you spend here OR he figures there must be something good happening here and he wants to get in on it too as a means of togetherness for you two?

    The only couple I know on my friend list that are both on Spark are TIREDOFWORKING and ROCKNBUTTERFLY. They are sweet, sometimes they comment on each others' blogs and stuff. They both have similar goals, it looks like, so it works for them.

    In your case I don't know what I would say, if you say no it looks like you're hiding stuff from him, and of course if he signs up you'll feel like you can't speak freely. Tough situation!

    WTG on the walk; that is so awesome! Bet you couldn't even IMAGINE doing all this just a short year ago!!! We are here to cheer you on all the way!!!

    Hope all works out for your son. That's what parents are for: to let the young ones fly from the nest and to be there if they goof things up here and there. I am so glad you are dealing with this without falling apart yourself. I am so proud of you.

    emoticon emoticon
    2743 days ago
  • WKLYTTON
    Lots of prayers and love to you and your son. I know that's gotta be tough. Hang in there and just love him.

    As for the BF on here.. HAHA! I'd have thought the same thing!!! My hubby is on FB and so yep, I'm careful on there.. Not that I have anything to hide, but you know what I mean. On here, this is MY place to come and chat with ladies who are going through what I go through. My place to vent it all out if I need to.. Maybe send him to caloriecount.com or something. Or Livestrong.com is a great site also! Not that I'm against him sparking, spark is AMAZING!!!!!! ..... agh. I guess I'm torn.. You'll figure out what's best for yall.

    Have a great day Terri !!! :)
    2743 days ago
  • RONIE11
    I agree that this is our site... when I hit my goal my hubby didn't see what a big deal it was until I tossed a fit... and now everyonce in a while he wants to see what I'm typing.. I tell him NO he isn't all that interested in all of what I'm doing he can keep his eyes to himself.. I personally would love for my hubby to log on and track all his food... he would be surprised to see that those 2 servings of pecan pie was all sugar and over 1000 calories... he may just then understand where the extra weight is coming from... I don't see you talking negativly about your BF... I don;t think he would care about what you do here anyway... we do girly stuff they would do guy stuff... I don't even know what a "guy" team would be but they would find those..lol
    as for your walking... thats amazing...I'm so proud of you.. that is really a lot of miles.. and I'm sure it does feel great.. maybe your son will walk with you when you can.. at least that way you can connect while walking.. I understand about the school work.. my son opted for in home on line classes and only had 2 to take last semester and still failed them... he has depression too and I worry so much over him.. I was thinking last night what can I do to get more involved so he would want to succeed at this.. I hope we find our answers.. this is so hard to stand by and watch..
    2744 days ago
  • LASARRE
    Sorry about the issues with your son, but I am so happy to see how you are handling it. Glad things are going well with the new BLC 15. As far as your boyfriend being on here, I understand what you are saying. You are looking for one place you can vent about anything and not feel like you are hurting someone you are close to. Maybe you could get him to join a different online site if all he wants to do is log. Have him go to livestrong.com. I used to log on there rather than Biggest Loser Club. It is really easy and has all the restaurants. It keeps track of sodium, fiber, etc. It is one of my favorite sites next to this one. That would seem to be a good compromise. Let me know if he is agreeable :)
    2744 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment


    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.
 

More Blogs by TKAYSMILES